Trader Joe's Spicy Dynamite Sauce

To me, this stuff tastes just like spicy mayo. It's a nice flavor with a good bit of heat that creeps up on you after a while. This product is vegan and its base is a vegan mayo spread made with soybean oil and sesame oil.

It's surprisingly thick and creamy. It coats quite well. The first things we tried it on were traditional hamburgers. It works just fine in lieu of regular mayonnaise.

I'm most excited about trying this stuff in my "tuna melt surprise" which involves dumping a bunch of random condiments in a bowl with a can of tuna, mixing it around, plopping it on some bread, topping it with cheese, and then heating it up in the oven or air fryer.

Most of our thoughts about this product were expressed in our short video review, embedded below. So why not watch the video, hit subscribe, click the "like" button, and leave us a comment about your thoughts on this product?

$2.99 for the 18 serving squeeze bottle. Product of Thailand. Sonia and I probably wouldn't buy it again, but if you're vegan you might want to check it out. Six and a half stars from the beautiful wifey. Seven out of ten stars from me for Trader Joe's Spicy Dynamite Sauce.

Bottom line: 6.75 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Sweet Ripe Plantains

Long ago, I hung out with some folks from São Paulo, Brazil pretty frequently. They loved telling us about how life was different in Brazil and exposing us to their cuisine and culture. We went to a few different Brazilian restaurants together, and the most common type of platter we'd encounter was a simple dish with a grilled meat of some kind, rice, either beans or a small salad, and finally fried plantains. In contrast to, say your typical Mexican food for example, there were very few sauces, salsas, and cheeses. Everything tasted remarkably clean and fresh.

Around the same time, I discovered Cuban cuisine. Lo and behold, nearly every Cuban dish I tried came with a side of extremely similar fried plantains. Apparently, they're quite common in most cuisines in the Caribbean, Central and South America, and even Africa. With such a huge portion of the world enjoying a specific side dish with such regularity, it's a wonder it never really caught on in the US.

In the same way you might serve sweet potatoes with turkey and stuffing, Sonia made a delicious platter of sautéed chicken seasoned with Trader Joe's Cuban Style Citrusy Garlic Blend, white rice, black beans, and these sweet ripe plantains. From frozen, she simply fried them in a little olive oil for a few minutes on each side. They were quite tasty—among the best plantains I've ever had.

The texture was soft and a little starchy, very similar to a raw banana. The flavor was surprisingly sweet, with no added sugars. The only ingredients in this offering are plantains and palm oil. They complemented our savory sides and gave the whole dish a wonderful natural sweetness.

$2.49 for the 6 serving bag, found in the frozen section. Kosher. Product of Honduras. Sonia and I would both buy again. I'll throw out a solid eight out of ten stars for Trader Joe's Sweet Ripe Plantains. The beautiful wifey will go with nine out of ten.

Bottom line: 8.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Harvest Brunch Dog Treats

We had to pick up these seasonally-appropriate pet treats because, hey, Alfred and Sadie love the fall just as much as we do. I mean, they really love all the seasons. Well, maybe not winter so much. They are half chihuahua, after all.

But spring, summer, and autumn, they're quite content. And why not celebrate the flavors of the fall along with us? Here we have waffle-shaped treats featuring real turkey, apple, and pumpkin. In fact, turkey is the number one ingredient. They even flaunt spices like basil, thyme, and sage. I don't think I've ever seen dog treats that have a sophisticated spice blend like that before.

These treats are a tad bit bigger and slightly tougher to chew than some of the other treats we looked at recently, so our fur babies will dock a few points for that reason. But they love the flavor of the treats and the fun, festive art work on the packaging and the overall autumnal harvest theme of the product. We've got another resealable bag here, so the treats stay nice and fresh for many days.

$3.49 for the 4.5 oz bag. We wish TJ's would offer a fall-themed dog treat that's tiny and super soft. The Pumpkin Flavored Dog Treats were fun, but they were way too hard for our pups. The Maple Bacon Stuffies were a big step in the right direction since they were soft and chewy, but the pieces were still way too big without breaking them in half. We're waiting for something along the lines of the Peanut Butter & Vanilla Dog Treats, but with a harvest theme instead of a Christmas one. Anyway, these treats are fun and harvestacular and would be great for bigger dogs. We'll go with seven and a half out of ten paw prints on this one.

Bottom line: 7.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Hard Top Chocolate Shell Topping

"What sort of wizardry is this?" I thought to my young self as I marveled at the combination of firm chocolate and soft, milky ice cream sitting atop my friend's waffle cone at the local Dairy Queen. I was sitting in a booth when my compatriot returned from the counter with the hard-shell dipped ice cream confection. "Why did I get this crummy Blizzard when I could have had that?"

Since then, the novelty of the hard shell ice cream has worn off, especially since they started selling the stuff in grocery stores. And, of course, I'm not thirteen anymore. But even as an old man, I still enjoy some creamy treats topped with child-like wonder every once in a while.

So I was excited when I squeezed this bottle of Trader Joe's Hard Top onto my bowl of ice cream for the first time. Except instead of a shiny chocolate liquid emerging, a long, narrow cylinder of dull brown goo came out of the container. It didn't coat the ice cream at all. We'd kept it at room temperature and never refrigerated it. So why was it so solid?

At any rate, Sonia read that you can put the squeeze bottle in warm water to re-liquefy it. After just a few minutes, I shook the bottle and determined that it had, in fact, returned to a much more viscous state. I squeezed out another shot and voila! Our vanilla ice cream had an attractive chocolate shell atop its center scoop (see photo above).

It's a darker chocolate than most chocolate shells I've had. It's rich and tasty. It coats and then immediately solidifies. It's still fun to tap the shell and listen to the little thud and then crack it into pieces before eating it.

Both the price and the ingredients of this product are comparable to other leading brands. Here's a link to the only other do-it-yourself ice cream hard top product I've ever had: Smucker's Magic Shell, in case you're interested.

$3.29 for the 6.17 oz squeeze bottle. This isn't a product we have any use for on a regular basis, but if for some reason we needed chocolate hard shell for our ice cream again, we'd consider grabbing Trader Joe's Hard Top Chocolate Shell Topping. Seven and a half stars from Sonia. Seven out of ten stars from me.

Bottom line: 7.25 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Parsley Crackers

This isn't the biggest box of crackers in the universe, to be sure, but at five plus ounces it ain't the smallest either. It's imported all the way from Italy, as a good many of Trader Joe's products are. I'm just saying, have you seen the price of a box of crackers lately? And I'm not talking fancy, top-of-the-line crackers for rich people that you'd find on a charcuterie board at the Met Gala or a rare vintage wine auction. I'm talking regular old water crackers or butter crackers.

They're easily more than double the price of these Italian imports. At $1.49, these parsley crackers are, if nothing else, a great bargain. One side is mostly dark green, infused with a significant amount of parsley flavor. I might even dare say they taste more like parsley than actual parsley tastes like parsley. That is to say, parsley by itself doesn't exactly pack a wallop in the flavor department. And while these crackers aren't a stellar snack just in and of themselves by my estimation, they do have a pleasant, salty, savory, herbaceous essence. I guess they taste as much or more like garlic as they do parsley, but that's just fine by me.

They go great with feta cheese. Olives, artichoke, egg, tuna, or any kind of canned fish really would work well with these crackers. Most cheeses would go great with them. Soups? I can't really think of a soup I wouldn't try these with.

There's a dense, crisp breadiness to these snacks. Texture-wise, they kind of remind me of certain pita crackers I've had. Along those lines, I think they'd go great with hummus or any other Middle Eastern type condiment.

The best crackers we've sampled from Trader Joe's in a great while, or maybe ever, were the Green Olive Flats, also imported from Italy. Those were just about double the price of these inexpensive morsels. I think I still prefer the texture and flavor of those olive flats, but these parsley crackers are quite decent, too.

If you're looking for something a little different for your next get-together or party, keep these in mind. Sonia and I would both buy them again. They're versatile, crunchy, and very inexpensive. Buck and a half for the 5.28 oz box. Product of Italy. Sonia will throw out eight and a half stars. I'll go with seven and a half out of ten.

Bottom line: 8 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Solid Light Yellowfin Tuna

I guess tuna canned in oil has more flavor and moisture than tuna canned in water, but it also has more calories and fat. It's more messy too, and when you eat as much tuna as we do, that's at least a minor consideration.

That said, if I'm going to buy tuna in oil, I prefer that it be olive oil. It's funny how every brand that packs their tuna in olive oil proudly specifies that it's "canned in olive oil" right on the packaging and in their advertising, while companies that use other oils like sunflower seed or soybean never specify what type of oil it is, but say simply, "packed in oil."

Anyhoo, this product is canned in the good old USA...with fish caught by pole and line in good old Indonesia. An interesting business model to say the least, but who am I to question Big Joe? International tuna tastes just as good as domestic tuna.

And it's your typical yellowfin here, flaunting a softer texture than albacore tuna and a slightly more pungent flavor. Fun fact: yellowfin is the only species of tuna that you'll regularly find as sushi, steaks, and canned. It's considered more versatile than its cheaper cousin skipjack but far more affordable than its fancy family member bluefin.

Would I buy Trader Joe's Solid Light Yellowfin Tuna in Olive Oil again? Sure. But I'd probably gravitate towards their Albacore Tuna by virtue of its cheaper price tag and packed-in-water status on the majority of my Trader Joe's runs.

$2.49 for the 5 oz can. Kosher. Dolphin safe. Found with the other tinned fish products. I give Trader Joe's Yellowfin Tuna seven out of ten stars. Sonia will go with seven and a half.

Bottom line: 7.25 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Sparkling Guava Juice Beverage

I guess we're a little late getting around to this item. It's a limited time summer seasonal offering and we're just about on the verge of the annual autumn pumpkin product parade. Oh well. Still shows currently available on traderjoes.com as of the time of the writing of this review, and there's a chance we'll see it again next year.

What's working here: the carbonation level of these beverages is always perfect. Not too bubbly, not too still. It enhances the beverage and gives it that extra level of refreshment. The fact that there are no added sugars is a huge plus. All the sweetness is coming from guava juice.

What's not working here: guava juice just isn't that potent or sweet. It's a subtle flavor. For some of you, I'm sure that's a good thing. For me, I think I prefer sweeter juices like strawberry or honeycrisp apple. See Trader Joe's Sparkling Strawberry Juice Beverage and Trader Joe's Sparkling Honeycrisp Apple Juice Beverage, the latter of which I hope is coming back with the onslaught of fall stuff in just a week or so. Those two really blew my socks off. They were delicious.

That's not to say this one isn't tasty. It's just not my cup of tea. The taste is just a shade sweeter than those cans of flavored sparkling water. It's not very robust at all.

Would I turn you down if you handed me a cold can of Sparkling Guava Juice Beverage after mowing the lawn on a hot, humid day? Heck no. Would I choose another flavor if given the choice? Probably.

$3.99 for four 8.45 fl oz cans. Product of Vietnam. Probably would buy one of those two above-mentioned flavors or something brand new before purchasing this one again. Not hating. Just not my personal fave. Six and out of ten stars from me for Trader Joe's Sparkling Guava Juice Beverage. Sonia will go with seven and a half out of ten.

Nathan's score: 6 out of 10.

Sonia's score: 7.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Pumpkin & Spice Snickerdoodle Cookie Mix

Prior to 2025, the only flavor of snickerdoodle I'd had was, you know, snickerdoodle-flavored snickerdoodles—cinnamon and sugar. Earlier this summer, we checked out Trader Joe's Strawberry Doodle Cookies, a product I didn't expect to work at all but was pleasantly surprised with.

I guess pumpkin spice isn't too far a cry from a classic snickerdoodle, since both flavors typically contain sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice, and clove or cardamom. Trader Joe's even threw in some actual autumn squash in the form of pumpkin powder for just a hint of harvestiness. It's balanced out by all the aforementioned spices and the nice soft breadiness of the cookies.

To prepare, you simply combine the mix with an egg, milk, and a stick of butter. Then you form the batter into little balls which then get rolled in the separate "sugar and spice mix." Bake for 10-12 minutes at 375°F and you've got about 22 pumpkin spice snickerdoodles.

Sonia and I both enjoyed the fresh-baked cookies quite a bit, and they're still scrumptious even after they've cooled down and solidified. We tried them for the first time live on camera, and you should totally watch, like, and comment on the YouTube video embedded below. <hint, hint>

The cookies are slightly crunchy on the outside thanks to the crystals of sugar and cinnamon. They're soft and chewy on the inside. We found the pumpkin spice level to be just about right here. We'd both buy this product again.

I kind of wanted to call them "pumpersnickle cookies." But then I Googled "pumpersnickle" and the Urban Dictionary entry for that word made me reconsider.

If it's not back on shelves at your local Trader Joe's now, it should be by the first or second week of September. $3.99 for the 17.57 oz box. Kosher. Eight and a half out of ten stars from Sonia. Eight out of ten stars from me for Trader Joe's Pumpkin & Spice Snickerdoodle Cookie Mix.

Bottom line: 8.25 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Organic Fruit Leather Wraps

Trader Joe's offered these same fruit bars over fourteen years ago. They even had the same wrappers, same colors, and similar, if not identical, ingredients. I'm not sure which flavors they had back then, but we were fortunate enough to snag Apple Raspberry and Apple Wild Berry for a blog post in 2011. Pretty sure we'd had them a few times before we got around to reviewing them so many years ago.

And now, they're back! After a lengthy hiatus, Trader Joe's has these same Organic Apple _____ <---- "insert random other fruit name here" type fruit bars once again. They're certified organic and they're only 49¢ a piece. Talk about a blast from the past.

This time we picked up five different flavors. Organic Sour Apple Watermelon, which I'm pretty sure is brand new, Apple Blueberry, Apple Strawberry, Apple Raspberry, and Apple Wildberry. Yes, "Wild Berry" was two words in 2011 and is now a single compound word in 2025. Go figure. My spell checker prefers the two word version. Maybe it just needs a system update.

Raspberry and Wildberry are both good vaguely berry-esque flavors. They're sweet and fruity and we'd buy 'em again for sure. Strawberry and Blueberry are even better. There's no mistaking the flavor of either one. They taste distinctly like their eponymous berries. Strawberry is the sweetest of those four flavors by a good bit.

And the Sour Apple Watermelon? It is simply divine. It's super sweet and simultaneously super sour. It's got a bold, bright taste and the same soft, moist texture of the other fruit wraps. It honestly tastes like sour candy, but there's nothing in it but fruit juices, pectin, and malic acid. We would buy that flavor by the dozen.

Score-wise, there's a bit of a hierarchy with this one. Sour Apple Watermelon will get top marks, landing squarely in The Pantheon. Strawberry and Blueberry will get "really darn good" status, and finally Raspberry and Wildberry will get a "not bad" score.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Organic Sour Apple Watermelon Fruit Wrap: 9.25
Bottom line: Trader Joe's Organic Apple Strawberry Fruit Leather Wrap: 8.5
Bottom line: Trader Joe's Organic Apple Blueberry Fruit Leather Wrap: 8.5
Bottom line: Trader Joe's Organic Apple Raspberry Fruit Leather Wrap: 7.75
Bottom line: Trader Joe's Organic Apple Wildberry Fruit Leather Wrap: 7.75

Trader Joe's Organic Margarita Mix

Guess we better sneak this review in before the end of the summer. Cold margaritas go hand in hand with hot weather. If you're at TJ's buying Apple Cider Donuts already, you're jumping the gun in my humble opinion. But hey, whatever floats your boat.

Just because your kids are going back to school doesn't make it fall yet. For it to be fall and truly feel like fall, it has to be (1) AFTER Labor Day and (2) COOL outside. Astronomically, fall doesn't start until September 22nd. If the calendar still says "August" and heat indices are routinely reaching for a hundred degrees, that puts us squarely in margarita season, my friends. So grab a glass and a couple of ice cubes and let's have a drink together.

This product is certified organic. It is the fifth margarita product we've tried from Trader Joe's, but it's the very first one we've tried that's organic. For the sake of historical record, we'll link to the other margarita reviews we've done.

Trader Joe's (not organic) Margarita Mixer

Trader Joe's Mango Margarita Mixer

Trader Joe's Lime Margarita

Trader Joe's Everything but the Bartender Margarita

This product is sweet, but not quite as candy sweet as the recently-reviewed EbtB Margarita in a can. There's little to no syrupy aftertaste here. It's an organic margarita that finishes surprisingly clean on the palate.

Instructions say to add 2 parts mix with 1 part tequila, though that can be modified to suit your taste. I've seen virgin margarita recipes involving orange juice or flavored sparkling water that would go well with this product if you're looking for something non-alcoholic. The mix is quite thick and heavy by itself, so you'll want to dilute it with something.

$3.99 for the 32 oz plastic bottle. Organic. Would buy again. All in all, it's a tasty product with great ingredients. I'll throw out eight out of ten stars for Trader Joe's Organic Margarita Mix. The beautiful wifey will follow suit.

Bottom line: 8 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Cheese & Green Chile Tamales

My mother-in-law is quite the tamale connoisseur, and these are about the only store-bought tamales that she fully endorses. The three main ingredients are corn masa, Monterey Jack cheese, and green chiles. It's not a fancy dish by any means, but it's a nice simple Mexican meal that's uber-convenient and not too pricey.

The corn, cheese, and chiles appear in the perfect ratio. There's not too much or too little of any one thing. We've always just microwaved ours, and the textures come out great, although we might wind up zapping ours a full minute or two more than the packaging suggests.

The product isn't over-seasoned or spiced up at all. There's a bit of salt and a faint hint of lime, but that's about all you can taste aside from corn flour, cheese, and green chile. There's a very mild spiciness from the chiles. It's a decent flavor on its own, but we might throw some hot sauce or salsa on the tamales if we're craving something a little more potent.

$3.79 for two tamales, found in the frozen section. This product has been around Trader Joe's for quite a while, though it's undergone a repackaging or two throughout the years. We've purchased this product numerous times, but this is the first occasion we've ever gotten around to reviewing it. Better late than never, I guess. Eight out of ten stars from me for Trader Joe's Cheese & Green Chile Tamales. Sonia will go with eight and a half out of ten.

Bottom line: 8.25 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Japanese Soufflé Cheesecakes

It was only a week or so ago, Sonia and I found ourselves watching something on YouTube about Americans losing weight when they move to Japan—the name of the channel escapes me at the moment. There were several reasons they mentioned, but the main one was that Japanese desserts have so much less sugar in them than American desserts. When an American tastes the average Japanese "sweet" it just doesn't appeal to them at first, but over time, their palates adjust and Japanese sweets eventually taste normal and American desserts are just over-the-top sugary.

This is probably a good example of the phenomenon. It's imported from Japan at a price point of just $3.49 for two of the fluffy cakes. It's much more airy and less dense than the typical cheesecake you'd find here in the US. It's also a good bit less sweet.

At 150 calories per cake, these soufflé cheesecakes are significantly less indulgent than most American desserts. It was a bit off-putting to me at first. When I see the word "cheesecake," I want something rich and heavy. To be fair, the word "soufflé" suggests something a little lighter.

By the end of my cake, the relatively understated flavor had grown on me. The cream cheese, milk, lemon, and tapioca provided a more subtle dessert flavor than I'm used to, but it's not inferior by any means. The product went great with strawberries, just as the serving suggestion on the packaging indicated.

Sonia loved hers from first bite. She would buy this again in a heartbeat. I'd happily eat it again, and I might dress it up with some different berries or even a dollop of whipped cream.

Available for a limited time only. Just a hunch, but this will probably be unavailable by the time TJ's fall stuff rolls in next month. Found in the frozen section—simply thaw for three hours in the fridge to prepare. Eight and a half out of ten stars from Sonia. I'll go with seven and a half for Trader Joe's Japanese Soufflé Cheesecakes.

Bottom line: 8 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Old Fashioned

Neither Sonia nor I had ever tried an Old Fashioned prior to picking up this product. Sonia, in particular, had always wanted to try one. The drink originated in the late 19th century, with bar patrons requesting that drinks be prepared "the old fashioned way."

I'm not sure how they prepared drinks "the new way" by 1880s standards, but folks were apparently craving nothing but whiskey, bitters, sugar, and water. That's basically what we have here. It's a mixed drink, but it's still nice and simple.

We've got a quality American bourbon, lightly buttery and sweet, balanced out by orange bitters in the background. On ice, with an orange slice and maybe a cherry or two, the drink is still whiskey forward, but it's not as harsh as drinking straight liquor. It has all the niceties of a fancy cocktail while still packing a punch in the spirits department.

The 750 mL bottle is 35% alcohol by volume, and it's got some classy, timeless artwork on the label. Sonia's a graphic designer, and she absolutely loves the packaging on this product. It's quite convenient having everything pre-mixed and ready to pour.

At $19.99 for the fifth, it's a pretty decent bargain, too. We'd both buy again. Eight out of ten stars from me for Trader Joe's Old Fashioned. Sonia will go with eight and a half out of ten.

Bottom line: 8.25 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Chocolate & Peanut Butter Lover's Nut Mix

Well, this product was released around Valentine's Day and for some strange reason is still around. It's an unusual mix of nuts, cookies, pretzels, and mini peanut butter cups. At first, neither Sonia nor I were particularly enamored with it. It seemed dry and kind of boring.

But over time, it grew on both of us. I think for me it was the uniqueness of the elements and the plethora of almonds and cashews in the bag. For Sonia, it was the absence of "milk chocolate gems" which seem to make an appearance in nearly all of Trader Joe's snack mixes that put this blend over the top into winning territory for her. Let's break it down ingredient by ingredient, as we've done in the past.

First up, Trader Joe's Tiniest Chocolate Chip Cookies. They're probably the most unnecessary element in the mix. At least at one point, TJ's sold these by themselves in a resealable bag. They got a 6.5 out of 10 on this blog. So...they're just kinda "meh." Plus, this is a chocolate and peanut butter lover's mix, not a chocolate chip cookie lover's mix.

Next, let's look at the pretzel sticks. Also somewhat pointless, but some type of pretzels generally get thrown into every trek mix/trail mix/nut mix/snack mix in existence. They add crunch and saltiness, but again, do they really have a place in a chocolate and peanut butter mix?

Mini Milk Chocolate Peanut Butter Cups. Okay, now we're talking. With plenty of milk chocolate and peanut butter in every little cup, these things are great. They make up for the humdrum cookies and pretzel sticks. In fact, if there were too many of these guys in the mix, it might be a bit too much chocolate and peanut butter.

Almonds. Whole almonds, roasted, covered in sea salt. Very nice. I guess you have to love almonds in addition to chocolate and peanut butter. Fortunately, both the beautiful wifey and I do.

Cocoa dusted dark chocolate almonds. More almonds, but with a twist this time. They have a layer of dark chocolate on them. A bit of dark chocolate in the mix is interesting. It provides a slightly richer flavor and a bit more complexity to the overall taste of the snack.

Cashews. It's getting pretty nutty in here now. Gotta love cashew halves. They just bring even more rich, nut-tacular flavor.

Finally, peanuts. Wait. There are no peanuts in a peanut butter lover's mix? Version 2.0 should totally have peanuts. If I were the mix master, I would lose the little cookies and throw in peanuts, for sure.

$5.49 for the 12 oz resealable bag. Kosher. In the end, the lack of peanuts and inclusion of a couple of superfluous elements will put me in the "not bad" territory. I'll spring for seven and a half stars out of ten on Trader Joe's Chocolate & Peanut Butter Lover's Nut Mix. Sonia will go with a full star more than me: eight and a half out of ten stars.

Bottom line: 8 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Italian-Style Wedding Soup

When I do reviews like these, I'm always torn over how to handle my prep for the post. On one hand, I can do a bunch of research and learn as much as possible about a particular offering, maybe read another review or two about the product at hand, particularly ones written by folks who are familiar with the dish, find out the history of the item and get a nice brief but broad education before I sample the food and share my thoughts.

On the other hand, I can just dive in with no expectations and no preconceived ideas about what something is or is not supposed to be. I think I sound a little smarter when I go the former route, but I might be a tad more honest if I go the latter route.

All that to say, I know nothing about Italian wedding soup and have never had it to the best of my knowledge, and I've decided to go the no-prep route on this fine occasion. The first thing that jumps out at me: this Italian wedding soup hails from Canada rather than Italy. That's fine. I'm sure there are plenty of Italian-Canadians that have carried on their proud soup tradition in the great white north just the same as grandma used to make in the old country.

The soup: it's a typical chicken broth with teeny tiny round pasta balls, carrot bits, beef meatballs, and little green flakey things I assume are parsley. The heartiest and most flavorsome of the elements are, of course, the meatballs. They're nice and soft, and their flavor is pleasant, but they're still not the most pungent meatballs I've ever had. They have egg whites, sheep's milk, and Romano cheese in them, but they don't taste quite as robust as their ingredients might make them sound.

The carrots and acini di pepe are even less potent, but they do add a nice selection of textures to the overall mouthfeel. The parsley adds some additional visual appeal and does...you know, whatever parsley is supposed to do.

So, I mean, this isn't the greatest soup I've had from Trader Joe's, but it's not the worst, either. It's vaguely like many chicken noodle soups I've tried in terms of overall taste and comfort food value, but with small beef meatballs instead of chicken.

In the end, I would turn to an Italian and ask, "Did those Canucks do your soup justice?" Because I honestly don't know myself. It's decent soup, but I would not seek it out again.

$4.99 for the 22 oz glass jar. Refrigerate after opening. It has come to my attention that this soup is not necessarily served at actual Italian nuptials. Go figure. The "wedding" part has something to do with a marriage of flavors or something silly like that. 

Six and a half stars out of ten from me for Trader Joe's Italian-Style Wedding Soup. Sonia's had Italian wedding soup from Progresso at least once. She liked it a bit more than this selection, flavor-wise, but notes that it has significantly more sodium than this soup from TJ's. Sonia will go with seven out of ten stars.

Bottom line: 6.75 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Spicy Mango Habanero Guacamole

Well, shoot. If mango can work with pico de gallo, who's to say it can't work in guacamole? Avocado, mango, onion, jalapeño, bell pepper, and habanero pepper. That doesn't sound half bad.

And it isn't. It's actually surprisingly delicious. The mango gives the whole thing a bright, sweet zip. The rest? It's like regular guac minus the tomato. I've never been a huge fan of raw tomato, so it's a step in the right direction as far as I'm concerned.

Sonia's a tomato-lover, but even she loves the refreshing uniqueness of this dip. It's great on chips. Isn't all guacamole great on tortilla chips? It's just as good if not better on fish tacos. We imagine it would work with shrimp tacos, chicken tacos, and probably even classic ground beef tacos—but we can tell you from experience that white fish, beans, and cheese in corn tortillas blend beautifully with mango guac.

We polished off the tub on the same day we opened it. At 35 calories per serving, we really don't feel too bad about doing that. We have no major complaints other than the word "spicy" in the title. I mean, it does contain jalapeños and habaneros, but they're well-tempered by the other ingredients and there's not much more than a faint residual heat, at least by our standards.

Would we buy it again? You betcha. $3.49 for the 10 oz tub. Kosher. Found in the refrigerated section. Eight and a half out of ten stars from me for Trader Joe's Spicy Mango Habanero Guacamole. The beautiful wifey will spring for nine stars.

Bottom line: 8.75 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Uncured Turkey Bacon

The texture of this turkey bacon is the star of the show here. It might be the best textured bacon I've ever had. It's "meatier" than your typical turkey bacon, it's thick, and it's decidedly not greasy.

You can still get the bacon nice and crispy if that's the way you like it. I don't like my bacon super charred or overly crispy. I like it just a tad chewy and somewhat soft. This product is perfect for that.

I wish I could be just as positive about the taste. Unfortunately, it's a little on the bland side. I've had turkey bacon that's delicious and succulent, but this one is lacking in that department by my reckoning. Sonia agrees, though she's not as displeased as I am. There's very little in the way of "hardwood smoked" flavor, too.

We're fans of Jennie-O turkey bacon. That brand uses white and dark meat in their product, while this one only uses turkey thighs. I'm on record more than once stating that I greatly prefer white meat poultry over dark meat, so that could be at least part of the problem.

Still, if you're making an egg sandwich or a BLT or something along those lines, you've got cheese or mayo and multiple other ingredients picking up the slack that might be left by not-so-flavorful turkey bacon, and there's nothing offensive about the taste either, so we won't shaft it too badly in the score department. Plus, it's got that amazing texture...

$3.99 for eight slices of bacon. Would buy again. We'll go with seven and a half out of ten in the end.

Bottom line: 7.5 out of 10.