Trader Joe's Double Fold Bourbon Vanilla Extract

Like most people, I love the smell of vanilla extract. I love it as an ingredient in all manner of desserts and cakes and I enjoy the flavor it provides. However, unlike most people, I even like the taste of it straight out of the container, plain. I mean, I wouldn't drink a whole bottle of it like that, but I probably could on a dare or some similar situation.

After taking in a few whiffs of this Double Fold Bourbon Vanilla Extract, I was absolutely enchanted. I informed Sonia that I was going to try it straight. She cautioned me against it in the same manner that my parents used to, but being the wild man that I am, I proceeded to pour a teaspoon full and lap it up like so much fragrant water.

It's harsh and full of alcohol, for sure, but I mean, some bourbon can be pretty harsh and astringent, flavor-wise. It's got a distinct bourbon flavor and plenty of pure vanilla, too. It's like a shot of regular vanilla extract mixed with a dash of straight bourbon, slightly stronger than a spoonful of normal vanilla extract.

As an ingredient in food, it lends a nice earthy sweetness. Sonia made some pancakes using this elixir, and they came out just a little more vanillatastic than pancakes made with normal vanilla extract. I made a London fog beverage with some Earl Grey, half and half, honey, and this stuff, and it was lovely.

At first $7.99 seems a little steep for just 3.55 fluid ounces, but considering the quality and the fact that it's imported all the way from Mauritius, it could be a lot worse. Hard to score something like this. I think I'll throw out three and a half stars. Put the beautiful wifey down for four on Trader Joe's Double Fold Bourbon Vanilla Extract with Vanilla Bean Seeds.

Bottom line: 7.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Chunky Garlic & Jalapeño Hot Sauce

First thoughts: looks like one of those Cholula or Tapatio or Texas Pete hot sauce bottles with a teensy little hole where you have to shake the bottle fairly vigorously to get the sauce to come out, so how could it possibly be "chunky"? There might be some pureed peppers in there or something like that, but this sauce being truly chunky seems unlikely.

Oh well, if it tastes like garlic and jalapeño I don't even care if it's chunky or not.

The verdict? Okay...it's...sorta chunky. The entire circumference of the mouth of the bottle is open. It's not like that super tiny narrow hole on other hot sauce bottles, which allows bits of jalapeño to flow from the container onto your food.

The taste? Briny! The jalapeño peppers are brined and they make the whole thing taste super salty. It's like garlic-flavored sea water with a little heat to it. Not my favorite hot sauce for sure. Not even close. This definitely won't replace Tapatio or Cholula in our household, and it definitely won't take the place of good tomato-based actually-chunky salsa for chip dipping or topping Mexican dishes.

I make this meal I call "tuna surprise" because the ingredients change every time we have it based on what condiments are available in our fridge at the time of creation... 

I have a feeling it will do pretty well as an element in tuna surprise. A little saltiness and heat never hurts that dish.

Maybe I just have to get used to it. It's not at all like what I was expecting. Supposedly this type of salsa is quite popular all throughout California's Central Coast. I only made it up that way once or twice during my Cali days.

$3.99 for the 10 oz. bottle. Sonia is similarly unimpressed. Three stars from her. Two and a half from me for Trader Joe's Chunky Garlic & Jalapeño Hot Sauce.

Bottom line: 5.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Organic Apricot Preserves

For my obligatory, self-indulgent, lead-in segue today, I have to mention my childhood pet, Apricot. I've brought her up before on this blog, though not recently. I really loved that dog. I still have dreams about her decades after her passing. I love the little monsters we have now, but that dog was very special. She had apricot-colored fur, hence the moniker. Hey, I was only six when I named her. Can't talk about apricots without thinking of that pup. Don't worry. Food review begins...NOW.

I thought preserves were supposed to have big chunks of fruit in them. This stuff does not. I mean there's teensy tiny little particles of fruit to let you know it did, in fact, come from real apricots, but all in all, it's pretty darn smooth. Does that make it jelly? Or jam? I dunno. All I know is it's pretty good.

It's sweet and tart like apricots. Who'd have guessed? Honestly the cane sugar pushes it decidedly over onto the "sweet" side of the equation. Works for me. Goes great with butter and toast—or in this case, an English muffin. It's also scrumptious with that recently-reviewed toscano cheese and crackers.

It's made with organic apricots and organic cane sugar. Good stuff. $4.29 for the jar. Would buy again. I don't know if it could ever take the place of good old grape or strawberry jelly, but it shall be added to the rotation for sure. Four stars a piece from Sonia and me for Trader Joe's Organic Apricot Preserves.

Bottom line: 8 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Unexpected Cheddar Cheese Spread

So...consuming this product has been one of those experiences that has me questioning numerous decisions I've made in the past. Namely: why didn't I buy Trader Joe's Unexpected Cheddar Cheese earlier? It has been available in block format for years, I'm pretty sure. Why didn't Sonia and I purchase that Shaved Cheese Blend, reviewed on this very blog, which also contains unexpected cheddar? Why did I not expect the cheddar to be as unexpected as Trader Joe's would have me expect? Why would I doubt TJ's like that?

I don't know. I don't even know if any of that last paragraph made any darn sense at all. All I know is that this is a really freaking amazing cheese spread. It's unexpectedly good.

So, my whole life, I've loved Cheez Whiz. As far as Philly cheesesteaks are concerned, I'm a wiz wit guy all the way. Sonia's with me on the "with onions" part of the equation, but she thinks the whiz is gross. She just thinks it tastes fake, and it does. Because it is fake. It's "processed cheese food." It's franken-cheese. And I mean, at this point, I eat it about once every 5 years, so it's not like it's a health concern or anything like that. I'm already getting side-tracked...

Here's our take on this product in a nutshell: Unexpected Cheddar Cheese Spread tastes like Cheez Whiz but not at all fake, and we both love it. It's sweet, smooth, salty, savory, creamy, tangy, and super spreadable. It's so thick and flavorful, just the thinnest layer of it adds such an amazing burst of luscious cheddar goodness that the tiny tub lasts longer than you might expect.

I'll be honest: most of the container was consumed by me just dunking water crackers right into the tub and eating them without anything else. But we did make tacos and sandwiches using this cheese and they were stellar, as well. I'm sure you could use it on pretty much anything.

It's not like an item you'd pair with wine to impress cheese snobs or anything like that. And I'm pretty sure most kids would love it. Low-brow or not, my mouth doesn't lie, and it LOVES Trader Joe's Unexpected Cheddar Cheese Spread. Now I definitely have to try the hatch chile version.

$4.99 for 9 oz. Best five bucks you'll spend all year. Perfect five stars from me. Four and a half stars from the beautiful wifey. That makes this our first entry into the Pantheon in over two months.

Bottom line: 9.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Crunchy Chili Onion Hummus

Well this stuff is clearly just Trader Joe's Chili Onion Crunch plopped on top of a traditional tub of hummus. That's not quite as weird as pickle flavored hummus or chocolate flavored hummus if you ask this guy, but it could still be considered "experimental" in nature, I suppose.

By a quick count, this is at least the ninth variety of hummus we've reviewed on this blog throughout the years, not counting the hummus we made ourselves using Trader Joe's Organic Tahini and some handy dandy cans of chickpeas we had floating around in the pantry. In short, I love hummus and most other garbanzo bean derivatives.

And I guess I'll just cut to the chase and say I'm a fan of this new-ish product. Initially, I was gonna say there's not nearly enough of the chili onion crunch, but after inhaling about half the tub within a few minutes of having opened it, mi boca es en fuego and I don't know how much more of that stuff I could have handled.

So the heat level is acceptable. Spice-o-phobes beware. It's not super hot either. My tolerance just isn't what it used to be. It's got a nice chili onion chickpea flavor with a bit of a kick. Big thumbs up from both of us.

Complaints? There's not much crunchiness to be found. The crispity-crunchity factor is severely dampened by the soft mush of the whirled garbanzos and tahini, but the coolness of the hummus also helps temper the spice level, too.

$3.99 for the tub. Would definitely buy again. Four stars from Sonia. Four and a half from me for Trader Joe's Crunchy Chili Onion Hummus.

Bottom line: 8.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Lemon Pesto Sauce

If you've been following this blog for any significant amount of time, you'll know I'm a big fan of lemon flavored stuff. And if you've been following this blog even longer than that, you might recall that I'm not a fan of traditional pesto made with pine nuts. Fortunately for me and for the score I'll give to this product, this pesto—as well as one or two other pestos from Trader Joe's that we've reviewed—are not made with pine nuts. Those previous two iterations were made with cashews, and this one's made with almonds. Did you know that lemon and almond blends together fairly well? I didn't either until recently.

By itself, this sauce is thick and oily with little chunks floating around. It's almost like super finely chopped almonds with lemon zest and sunflower seed oil. Well, I mean, it is all those things...and a few other things, too. But it not only looks primarily like those three ingredients, but it basically tastes that way as well. It's citrusy, sweet, salty, oily, and nutty. I wouldn't recommend eating it straight from the jar, although it's interesting enough you might want to at least try it that way.

Sonia cooked up a shrimp and pasta dish using this stuff. It involved fettuccine, cream, butter, shredded parmesan cheese, and garlic. Ohmygosh. I finished eating it an hour ago and I can still barely keep my head up from the comfort food coma. It was lemony, creamy, spicy, and garlicky. So delicious.

My only complaint was that Sonia didn't use enough of Trader Joe's Lemon Pesto Sauce, so I dumped a bunch more onto my portion. I've never had lemon garlic butter shrimp quite so tasty. I'll easily finish all the leftovers tonight. Actually, here's the recipe she used: Pat Cooks. Highly recommend.

$3.49 for the jar. Would buy again. Four stars from the beautiful wifey. Four and a half stars from me for Trader Joe's Lemon Pesto.

Bottom line: 8.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Strawberry Basil Vinaigrette

Vinaigrette. Is it like the female version of "vinegar"? I mean, we have Smurfette, who's the original female Smurf. Then we might have a kitchenette or a launderette, which are basically like petite versions of the originals. And of course the suffragettes were all females looking for the right to vote and stuff.

Should a self-respecting man be eating vinaigrette at all? If he wants a little something on his greens, wouldn't it be a lot more manly to just dump a bunch of household cleaning vinegar on his salad? The answers to these questions and more...are definitely not is this review. But they are worth pondering.

So I asked Google's new AI chatbot named Bard what it had to say about the matter. He gave me four paragraphs as a response, the last and most pertinent of which read: "If you are looking for a manly way to dress a salad, I recommend using a vinaigrette made with good quality olive oil, vinegar, and herbs. This will give your salad a delicious and healthy flavor without any of the risks associated with using cleaning vinegar."

Thanks, Bard. You always know what's up. Although, in this particular product, we have canola oil instead of good quality olive oil. Some folks think that's a bad thing. Apparently, canola oil causes inflammation, and that's something I'm trying to avoid.

Also, there are a total of 4g of sugar, all of which are "added sugar." You'd think there'd be some natural fructose from the strawberry puree, but I guess the amount is negligible. Must all come from the cane sugar.

And this dressing is definitely sweet. It's at least teetering on the verge of too sweet. It's quite strawberry forward, and there's definitely a spicy, earthy basil essence underneath. The vinegar flavor doesn't come through very much at all. The dressing isn't particularly tangy or tart to my taste buds.

$3.99 for the 8 serving bottle. I wouldn't buy this one again. I just don't do sweet summer berry salads enough to make it worth it, and I feel like I've had better berry balsamics and berry vinaigrettes than this one. As usual, Sonia will be a little more positive and lenient. She likes the sweetness level and strawberry flavor.

Two and a half out of five stars from me. Three and a half stars from Sonia for Trader Joe's Strawberry Basil Vinaigrette.

Bottom line: 6 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Calabrian Chili Spicy Pasta Sauce

Some of you might remember a Calabrian chili soup reviewed on this blog a couple years ago. Russ apparently liked it quite a bit, but Sonia and I were unable to procure a jar at the time. And it was just brought to my attention that Trader Joe's Bomba Sauce is made with Calabrian chilis too. We love that stuff and have it all the time, but I never realized I was eating Calabrian chilis until now! Guess I should read labels once in a while.

Anyway, we were able to snag this fancy pasta sauce on our last TJ's run so we can see what all the fuss is about. First impressions? Holy cow! How is this not MORE popular?

Trader Joe's Calabrian Chili Spicy Pasta Sauce flaunts a bright, tangy, smoky, sweet flavor profile with a moderate amount of zesty Calabrian chili heat. There's something fruity, almost citrusy to the taste. It's got some faint onion and garlic vibes and some typical Italian herbs like oregano and basil, but all in all, this is just head and shoulders above your average Italian pasta sauce.

I'd put the heat level somewhere around a 5 or 6, on a scale of 1 - 10. It's enough to clear your sinuses and warm your chest, but not enough to make you want to slow down shoveling forkful after forkful into your mouth.

My only complaint is that I'd like a chunkier version. There are little slivers of onion throughout the sauce, but they're quite small and far and few between. I'm really tempted to throw a bunch of beans and veggies into the remainder of this sauce and make an actual vegetarian chili or even get some ground beef and turn it into chili con carne.

I'd try this on any kind of pasta, pizza, or as a glaze for red meat, poultry, you name it. I really like this sauce a lot and could see it becoming a mainstay in our house. I can't imagine me craving boring old Ragu or Prego over Calabrian chili sauce ever again.

$4.99 for the jar. Absolutely will buy again. I'm sure there are other brands and varieties of Calabrian chili pasta sauce out there, but please don't discontinue this one, Trader Joe. Or offer a chunky version before you do. Four and a half stars from Sonia for Trader Joe's Calabrian Chili Spicy Pasta Sauce. Perfect five from me. 

Happy Fourth of July!

Bottom line: 9.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Spanish Saffron

What madness is this? A tiny jar of red threads for six bucks nestled among Trader Joe's more conventional spices? Who would pay $5.99 for two and a half tenths of an ounce of anything? Wait. 0.025 oz. That's two and a half hundredths of an ounce! I grew more and more indignant the more I thought about it.

Enraged, I looked for an unsuspecting Trader Joe's employee to focus my wrath upon as once more I thought, "WHO in their right mind would pay SIX BUCKS for a teeny tiny jar of a mysterious spice from Trader Joe's???"

I would. Of course. The answer to the riddle was ME, naturally, that's who. And I composed and calmed myself once more as I added the tiny glass cork-topped bottle to my cart. We're in this for the adventure, no matter the cost.

The interzones told me to only use two or three threads of this Spanish saffron per serving, otherwise it might overpower the dish. Must be some potent stuff here. Let's find out if it's true.

I didn't find the saffron overpowering per se, even when I used well more than three threads with my food. It's definitely honey-esque, but the sweetness is balanced out by a complex blend of earthy undertones. There's something quite floral about the taste and smell, as well. Experts liken the essence of Spanish saffron to grass or hay. While I can see how they draw the comparison, smell-wise, I find the concept of eating grass or hay too unappealing to mention in the same sentence as this expensive, hand-harvested spice.

Sonia disagrees. She finds Trader Joe's Spanish Saffron decidedly hay-ish. She must have been a horse in a past life. I don't even know what hay tastes like.

I also felt my tongue go numb after bites that contained large pieces of the saffron. It was an interesting sensation—not at all unpleasant, but quite unexpected. It's possible I experienced a mild allergy to the spice. Fortunately the reaction stopped on my tongue and didn't affect my throat or respiratory system. I guess I should exercise a bit of caution when consuming unusual plant matter that my body is unfamiliar with.

This will be a fun one to experiment with. I can't see it not working with any rice-based dish. I feel cultured and worldly just having a bit of this in my cupboard. Hopefully we'll get a chance to impress a few guests with it in the near future. Kosher. Product of Spain. Three and a half stars from Sonia. Four stars from yours truly.

Bottom line: 7.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Dukkah

Insert immature "mother dukkah" pun here. Or don't, you know, in case that sort of thing is beneath you. I get it. Not everybody is a forty-something man-child that still appreciates middle school toilet humor.

Ahem. I heard about this stuff a long time ago but never tried it until now. It's apparently a Middle Eastern condiment made with spices, nuts, and seeds. This particular variety has tiny almond bits and sesame seeds as the main ingredients.

There are two other types of seeds in the mix, but everything is pretty well pulverized into teeny tiny specks, rather than big crunchy bites. I mean, obviously sesame seeds are very small to begin with, but I don't think I've ever seen a whole fennel seed or anise seed, so I couldn't tell you what they look like normally.

Trader Joe's Dukkah basically looks like gravel, but it tastes pretty good. As you'd expect, it's seedy and nutty, but the spices bring a lot of flavor to the table as well. There's something almost licorice-esque about the taste. I guess that's the fennel. Or could be the anise. I guess they both vaguely taste like licorice, but spicier and with a whisper of something minty.

It's a complex taste that works well with olive oil. The little round container says to dip "crusty bread" in olive oil and then dip it in the dukkah. I tried it with plain pita chips and it made them significantly more interesting. I also tried coating some pan fried chicken breast with the dukkah. Not bad. Like breaded chicken, but with more flavor and texture. We'll try with salmon next.

$3.29 for the small cylinder. Would buy again, although there's just a tad too much licorice flavor to make it something I'd reach for on a daily basis. Four stars from the beautiful wifey. Put me down for three and a half for Trader Joe's Dukkah.

Bottom line: 7.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Black Garlic

I freaking love garlic. I've sung its praises on this blog numerous times in the past. I mean, I'm not a huge fan of what it does to one's breath, although if you and your partner both have it at the same meal, it's never quite as offensive as when only one of you has partaken of the potent plant's pungency.

It's delicious raw or cooked, in sauces, salsas, dips, chips—you name it, it works. I know they even have garlic ice cream. I think I'll pass on that, though.

You'd think I'd have heard of black garlic a long time ago, but its existence has only recently come to my attention. The easiest way to describe the flavor is with the following analogy:

black garlic : plain garlic :: caramelized onions : raw onions

Black garlic is to plain raw garlic as caramelized onions are to raw onions. Yes. It says right on the shaker it has a "caramelized-like flavor." It might sound a little awkward to put it like that, but it's not wrong. Trader Joe's Black Garlic is actually a little sweet. It's a rich, dark, earthy sweetness, but it's definitely kinda sweet.

Texture-wise, it's like large grains of salt. It makes food just a little crunchy and gritty, but in a good way. I added it to a bagel with plain cream cheese, and black garlic made every aspect of it better. I even tried it on hamburgers, and it worked better than I'd expected. I imagine you could use it on just about anything salty or savory.

$2.99 for about one net ounce of the condiment. Kosher. I'd buy it again. It has rice hull as an "anticaking agent" in the ingredients, but you still might find the grains are stuck together. Just break them apart with a fork before shaking. 

Four and a half stars a piece from Sonia and me on Trader Joe's Ground Fermented Black Garlic.

Bottom line: 9 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Hot Pico de Gallo Salsa

Hot take: Trader Joe's Hot Pico de Gallo Salsa isn't hot, but it's still really good.

Jalapeño peppers are right there—the third ingredient on the list. I'm not sure if our jalapeños were just extra tame or if there simply weren't enough of them, but this salsa that so boldly proclaims itself "hot" was not particularly spicy to either my palate or that of my lovely wife.

And Sonia knows pico de gallo. She's been eating it her whole life. I've been eating it since the 2000's, when I discovered Baja Fresh. Man, they had the best pico de gallo. I mean, theirs wasn't hot either, but you could mix it with spicy salsa and make your own hot pico if you wanted to. Up until now, Baja Fresh had the best pico de gallo either of us had ever eaten.

I think Trader Joe's Hot Pico de Gallo Salsa may now have stolen that title. It's quite flavorful. I guess maybe the tomato, lemon, and cilantro have a cooling effect on what little heat the jalapeños provide. We can always add our own hot sauce or spicy salsa.

It just tastes fresh. The tomatoes, onions, and peppers are pristine and healthy-looking, and they taste like they were just sliced yesterday, rather than sitting in a plastic tub for weeks, being carted all over America in a hot box truck.

Anyway, we'll probably buy it again despite its lack of heat. $2.99 for the 12 oz tub. Four and a half stars a piece for Trader Joe's Hot Pico de Gallo Salsa from Sonia and me.

Bottom line: 9 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Sriracha Sprinkle Seasoning Blend

Second only to ketchup, sriracha might be my favorite condiment of all time. Unlike ketchup, however, I didn't grow up with it. I think I discovered it in the mid-2000's, when I was a daring twenty-something roaming the streets of Los Angeles, discovering new foods and new adventures each and every week. It was undoubtedly Vegan Glory or some other top-notch Southland Thai-style restaurant where I first partook of sriracha's tangy, fermented flavor and spicy zing.

My sinuses had been lulled to sleep slowly over those first couple years in the arid air of Southern California, and sriracha helped snap my sense of smell and taste buds back to life. Since the late 2000's or so, Sonia and I have perpetually had a bottle of the stuff on hand in our kitchen.

That said, I was similarly disappointed with Trader Joe's Sriracha Sprinkle Seasoning Blend like I was with the ketchup sprinkle, although not to the same degree. I'll get the negative out of the way first: there's just no way this stuff is as good as real sriracha. Not even close.

But that said, most of my remaining thoughts are positive. It's spicy, though there's a different feeling to the heat here. The first ingredient in this seasoning blend is garlic, while the first ingredient in traditional sriracha is generally chiles.

Sriracha just tastes and feels like super flavorful, liquefied hot chiles, and of course, it's brilliant. Trader Joe's Sriracha Sprinkle Seasoning Blend tastes mostly like garlic powder mixed with cayenne pepper. There's a hint of vinegar in there, too, but it's fairly understated and undetectable.

I feel like I might have enjoyed this product a bit more if it weren't called "sriracha" since I get my hopes up every time I see "sriracha" plastered on a food product. If it had been called Trader Joe's Garlic and Cayenne Spicy Seasoning Blend, I might have been pleasantly surprised rather than slightly let down.

And once again, if the apocalypse finally arrives and the supply chain breaks down and real sriracha is nowhere to be found, I must say this seasoning will certainly be better than no sriracha at all...but that's not really saying that much. Sonia feels the same.

$2.99 for the 2.5 oz shaker. Three stars from me for Trader Joe's Sriracha Sprinkle Seasoning Blend. Sonia will throw out three and a half.

Bottom line: 6.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Ketchup Flavored Sprinkle Seasoning Blend

When I was a kid, people used to tell me, "Your taste buds will change, Nathan, and you'll grow to love tomatoes." Yuck. Raw tomatoes never did it for me. I would eat all manner of fruits and even most veggies as a young kid, but I could never get into the taste of raw tomato.

Now, ketchup, on the other hand, was an absolute staple of my diet. I was fine with tomato soup, tomato sauce, and tomato everything—just not the fruit they were all derived from. Due to food allergies and sensitivities, I'd often have nothing but a plain burger for breakfast as a child. No bread. No cheese. It was sometimes beef, but often bison or something more exotic. As long as I could have it with ketchup, I was a happy camper.

I'd put ketchup on fries, scrambled eggs, hash browns, and pretty much any kind of meat. I loved the stuff. I still do, although I prefer hot sauce on eggs and hash browns now. But if Sonia and I get burgers and fries, I absolutely need a bunch of ketchup to go with my food.

So I simply assumed I'd love Trader Joe's Ketchup Sprinkle Seasoning Blend. Powdered ketchup. Why not?

But I don't love it. And I can't quite put my finger on why it's nowhere near as good as real ketchup. So far I've only tried it on fries and burgers. It doesn't really work in either case.

The beautiful wifey tried to stay positive and pointed out that if for some reason the apocalypse comes and fresh ketchup is no longer available and we've used up all our spare packets from fast food places, that Trader Joe's Ketchup Flavored Sprinkle Seasoning Blend would be better than nothing. Yeah, I guess. I'm reluctant to even give it that much credit. But yeah. If real ketchup were to suddenly vanish from the earth, I guess this ketchup-themed condiment would be better than nothing at all.

It tastes like powdered tomato and sugar. Weirdly, I feel like it tastes more like tomato than actual ketchup does. Maybe that's why I don't like it that much. Maybe folks who actually like the taste of tomato, like Sonia, will enjoy this more than I do. It's just a theory, but I think there may be something to it.

I would never purchase this again. It's worse than the worst real ketchup I've ever had: the ketchup from fast food restaurants in Europe. Their ketchup is like three quarters vinegar. Blech.

Time will tell whether Sonia likes it enough to use it up and get another shaker. My gut says she won't use it much, if at all. She'll give it a decent score, though. Three and a half stars from her.

$2.99 for the 2.6 oz shaker. I'll give Trader Joe's Ketchup Seasoning Blend two out of five stars. Better than no ketchup at all...but that's as far as I'll go.

Bottom line: 5.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's White Miso Paste

Up to this point, my experience with miso has simply been miso soup in Asian restaurants. Miso is generally made with fermented soy beans and sometimes, as is the case here, with rice. Every miso soup I've tried is a cloudy white/tan color, and it tastes mostly just salty. There has always been a faint savory, umami essence, too. I've had it plain, and I've had it a few times with noodles, tofu, and/or some sparse veggies like green onions and peas.

I guess you could look at Trader Joe's White Miso Paste as a shelf-stable base for multiple bowls of plain miso soup, or you could think of it as a unique Japanese condiment to put on...whatever. The pouch suggests adding it "to sauces, dressings, soups, and marinades." Okay.

I thought it might add a bit of fanciness and flair to a cheap cup of ramen, so that's how I experimented with it first. A few globs of the stuff added a slightly richer, fermented flavor to the otherwise thin, watery ramen broth. It took my soup one tiny step in the direction of "authentic Japanese restaurant fare" from "poor college kid instant lunch."

But in the end, it didn't really transform the meal in any significant way. I tried adding a few more globs, and honestly, there wasn't a whole lot of difference. It just made the broth cloudier and thicker, while only slightly enhancing the flavor.

We'll keep experimenting. Using it as a marinade on chicken or fish sounds fascinating to me, but I don't think I'll get around to that before I put up this blog post. Let us know if you've tried anything like that in the comments below.

$2.99 for the pouch. Imported from Japan. Refrigerate after opening. Don't think we'd purchase again, but hey, let the adventure continue...

Three stars a piece from Sonia and me for Trader Joe's White Miso Paste.

Bottom line: 6 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Pizza Sprinkle Seasoning Blend

Whenever Sonia and I purchase a new seasoning blend from Trader Joe's, we like to kick things off with a little brainstorming session about what we could potentially do with our newfound condiment. With this one, I immediately thought of turning our run-of-the-mill everyday quesadillas into little Mexican-Italian fusion pizzas.

It might have come off a little blasphemous to the beautiful wifey, since quesadillas are to her like bread and butter are to us white folks. But before she could object, I reminded her of the wise words of Ted Lasso: You don't bring an umbrella to a brainstorm.

And in no time flat, I had a flour tortilla topped with a slice of mozzarella warming in the microwave. About 30 seconds later, I was administering a dusting of Trader Joe's Pizza Sprinkle Seasoning Blend over the subject of my culinary experiment.

And voila, the fastest, easiest pizza in the history of mankind was born. I mean...you could argue those pizza Lunchables are even easier, since you don't even need to warm them. Although, let's face it: they're kinda gross.

My pizzadilla creation was surprisingly not gross, though I suppose I'm a bit biased, and a lot would depend on the type of tortilla you used and whether you used good cheese or not. A lot would depend on using the right amount of this seasoning, too. Too much could easily overpower a simple, mild cheese like mozzarella. Just a dusting and not much more seemed to work quite well in this instance.

I could see us finding dozens of different uses for this seasoning blend. Pizzadillas, pizza fries, pizza pasta, pizza burgers, pizza veggies, pizza omelettes? Trader Joe's Pizza Sprinkle Seasoning Blend will get a thumbs up from both Sonia and me.

$2.99 for the shaker. Four stars from Sonia. Four and a half from me.

Bottom line: 8.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Everyday Seasoning with Grinder

Maybe I'm still shell-shocked by the unreasonable amount of peppercorn in the recently-reviewed Trader Joe's Peppercorn Snack Bites with Peppercorn & More Peppercorn or I feel like I've had enough peppercorn flavor to last a lifetime, but even the relatively well-balanced peppercorn taste here in Trader Joe's Everyday Seasoning is a little much for me.

Again, I like the taste of peppercorn, black pepper, and pretty much any pepper derivative, as far as condiments and seasonings are concerned. I just don't like an overabundance of it. And I honestly think Trader Joe's Everyday Seasoning might have been a contender for my Pantheon of great TJ's foods if there were just two minor alterations to this seasoning blend:

1. Tone down the peppercorn in relation to the mustard seed, garlic, onion, and chili pepper flavors.

2. Lose the salt altogether.

Why get rid of the salt, you ask? Well, for one thing: who doesn't have salt in their home? You can always add it separately if you wish.

I'm often using these Trader Joe's seasonings to flavor foods that already have salt in them. You can make a cheap microwave meal a gourmet dining experience simply by adding Trader Joe's 21 Seasoning Salute. Those TV dinner type things are already loaded with sodium and there's no need to add more.

At least some of TJ's other seasoning blends like the Ajika Seasoning and the Za'atar Seasoning that contain some salt have it much lower on their ingredients list. In this case, salt is number one. I guess sea salt is preferable to regular salt, but still, there's roughly the same amount of sodium in both.

$1.99 for the shaker. I must admit the built-in grinder is fun and convenient. Sonia likes this blend for cooking purposes and will score it a little higher than I do for that reason. Four stars from her. I give Trader Joe's Everyday Seasoning three stars.

Bottom line: 7 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Salmon Rub Seasoning Blend

Salmon, when done right, is right up there with my favorite foods of all time. I'm talking nice sit-down restaurant, cooked and seasoned to perfection, served with lemon, herbs, and some fancy sides. It's hard to beat that in my book. I'd generally prefer top-shelf salmon over steak, chicken, or any other meat.

Unfortunately, I've had my share of sub-par salmon. Trader Joe's has offered up a doozy or two throughout the years. There's also been some good ones, too. Salmon can be done perfectly, or it can be perfectly awful, and there's a whole lot of gray area in between.

But if you're into buying frozen salmon fillets like Sonia and I are, and you're looking for something to take that middle-of-the-run salmon into superb​ territory, Trader Joe's Salmon Rub Seasoning is your new best friend.

It's best when used as an actual rub—that is, put some olive oil on the fish and then sprinkle this seasoning on it and literally rub it in before baking/air frying/grilling your fillet. But honestly, it's not terrible when just sprinkled on already-cooked fish after the fact.

It's the perfect blend of sweet, smoky, and savory. There's no one element that's overpowering, and it enhances the flavor of the fish exquisitely.

A lot of times if something contains a "smoked" ingredient, I find it revolting for some reason. Not this time. There is a faint smoked flavor, for sure, but it doesn't taste like chemicals and it's not overpowering at all. The smoked paprika is very welcome here as it rounds out the brown sugar sweetness and really adds to the flavor profile without being obnoxious.

I'm sure some folks will find it a tad on the sweet side, but Sonia and I both loved it. $2.69 for the 2.6 oz shaker. Four and a half stars a piece for Trader Joe's Salmon Rub Seasoning Blend.

Bottom line: 9 out of 10.