Trader Joe's Plum Torte

So apparently, tortes and tartes are totally different things. They're both baked goods that can prominently feature fruit, but tortes often contain decadent fillings like ganache, mousse, or chocolate. A torte is a type of cake, while a tarte is a type of pastry. Tartes are French in origin, while tortes hail from Austria and Germany.

Trader Joe's Plum Torte, however, comes to us from Canada. Unlike traditional tortes, this one uses a wheat flour base instead of ground nuts. This is, in fact, the very first torte that Sonia and I have ever had, so we really can't vouch for its authenticity.

But we can vouch for its scrumptiousness. Absolutely divine. From frozen, bake for 20 minutes at 350°F and you've got a stellar dessert for six people.

The crust gets a little firm and almost crunchy on the outside, yet it's soft and moist on the inside. It's sweet and oh-so-buttery. It's just fine by itself...but the plum filling is even better. The beautiful wifey and I were both skeptical that the texture of the plums—particularly their skins—would be melt-in-the-mouth delicious. We feared something leathery, chewy, and/or stringy that could ruin the mouthfeel of the dessert. One bite and we realized our fears were totally unfounded.

The plum filling is at least as good as the breading. It's like a sweet jelly with real plums baked right in. Please watch the video review embedded in this post to see tons of close up shots of the torte in action. Certain bites feature what appear to be entire plums. Delicious.

Our biggest complaint? Not every bite contains plums. Once you've had a bite or two with huge amounts of the plums and the filling, you suddenly want every bite to be bursting with the fruit, but they're just not distributed very evenly. They're tart and sweet and almost reminiscent of a berry medley in terms of flavor.

This toothsome treat does not need any help in our humble opinions, but if you were so inclined, we're quite certain whipped cream or a scoop of vanilla ice cream would make this dish even more delectable. We'll try it that way next time. It's nearly plum perfect as is.

Eight bucks for this big 1 lb 2.7 oz box. Product of Canada. Kosher. Would buy again. This is a Thanksgiving Dinner caliber dessert by our reckoning. I wouldn't be ashamed of bringing this as my contribution to the dessert table alongside Turkey Day legends like apple pie and pumpkin pie. The beautiful wifey and I both gave Trader Joe's Plum Torte eight and a half stars out of ten during the recording of our video review. Having reheated and re-tasted it, in retrospect, I'd give it a nine.

Bottom line: 8.75 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Fiesta Guacamole

I certainly didn't grow up eating a lot of guacamole, but I love it. I'm not sure if I'd consider myself a connoisseur of fine guacamole, but here are a few of my credentials: I've eaten it at more than a few decent Mexican restaurants. Sonia and I (emphasis on Sonia) have made our own guac before. We mashed avocados and added our own onions, tomatoes, lemon juice, salt, and a few spices. We've eaten and/or reviewed:

Trader Joe's Spicy Mango Habanero Guacamole

Trader Joe's Chunky Spicy Guacamole Autèntico

Trader Joe's Reduced Guilt Chunky Guacamole

Trader Joe's Avocado Mash

So you know, I'm at least a casual guac fanatic as I'm sure many of you are, as well. Sonia's been eating it since she was a kid, so her guacamole roots go back even farther than mine. And not only are we fond of guac, but we're quite fond of roasted corn and black beans, including any and all corn & bean salsas that we've tried. So Trader Joe's Fiesta Guacamole with Black Beans & Fire Roasted Corn seemed like it'd be right up our alley.

It's good, but it could be better. The corn and beans add a little bit of texture to the guac, but not a whole lot of flavor. And since the guac is so full of corn and beans—which would normally be a good thing—there's not a lot of room for all the pico de gallo type ingredients which give other guacamoles a lot of their flavor.

Don't get me wrong, the product still has some onion, garlic, and pepper flavor, but it needs more of it. It lacks that punch that a lot of excellent guacamole dips provide. It lacks sass. I want to love it, but I just can't help but compare it to the above-mentioned mango habanero guacamole. That stuff was spicy and potent and it brought a wonderful, bright tropical flavor that was totally unique. Corn and beans just don't have the pungency required to punch through the dense earthiness of avocado.

We put it in tacos, we used it as a dip with tortilla chips, and we did a few other fun things with it in the kitchen. And that's probably where this Fiesta Guacamole works best. It's versatile enough to add some creaminess, corn, beans, and a little bit of flavor to whatever you're making. I could see it working nicely on nachos, burritos, quesadillas, or even alongside some grilled chicken or steak. So it's not like this stuff is useless by any means. It's just that when we ate it straight up as guacamole, we kept wishing it had a little more personality.

We'll finish the tub, no problem, but we probably wouldn't go out of our way to purchase again. $3.49 for the 10 oz container. Found in the refrigerated section. Kosher. Product of Mexico. Seven out of ten stars from both the beautiful wifey and me for Trader Joe's Fiesta Guacamole with Black Beans & Fire Roasted Corn.

Bottom line: 7 out of 10.