Trader Joe's Brioche French Toast

Sonia and I have been working remotely since before our full-time travel days, and long before the covid-19 craziness. In fact, we've both worked from home since late 2016, in my case significantly longer than that.

We learned quickly that the whole "stay in your pajamas all day because you can" philosophy has a few distinct weaknesses attached to it, number one being weight gain. It's just too easy to think, "Ah my sweatpants fit me the same as they did yesterday. I'm not putting on any pounds." Throw on some jeans or khakis, and they'll tell you a different story. "Hmm. I must have left these in the dryer too long. And my belt...has obviously shrunk due to an excessive amount of humidity in the air. Yeah, that's it."

So obviously when you're not getting out as much, it's much easier to become... "pleasantly plump" shall we say? What to do? Exercise as often as you can whatever way you can. And watch what you eat. I'm no poster child for fitness these days, but I'm not letting myself go, either. I'm standing my ground in the battle of the bulge. Maybe some food shortages will do us all a bit of good. Or maybe we'll all starve to death. Time will tell.

All that to say that Sonia and I each ate two of these brioche French toast pieces for breakfast yesterday. They're filling enough, so one each might have sufficed, but we were both unusually hungry. And to put it in perspective, two of these incredibly indulgent carb-o-riffic breakfast breads contain fewer calories than a single package of two Pop-Tarts. And which of us has never eaten two Pop-Tarts in one sitting? Let him cast the first stone.

At any rate, Trader Joe's Brioche French Toast is delicious. It's sweet even before you put any syrup on it. There's a distinct eggy flavor, and lots and lots of fluffy white bread.

We made our first two toasts in the oven. They didn't come out as crispy as I thought they might, but not in a bad way. There was a firmness and density to the outer crusty layers of French toast, while the inner layers were super soft and light. The microwave yielded just slightly less delectable textures, with everything winding up just a tad in the direction of "chewy," but still scrumptious. Also, the microwave is 15 minutes faster than the oven, and that's not counting pre-heating time. In each instance, we ate them with butter and maple syrup, and they were amazing.

$3.49 for four thick pieces of scrumptious toast. Four stars a piece.

Bottom line: 8 out of 10.

Trader Joe's 100% Ginger Drink Mix

You are what you eat...and apparently now I can officially be what I drink!

Yup, through and through, I'm 100% a ginger. Both my parents had red heair - my mom's kinda blonded out a bit, and my dad's kinda retreated and browned - but both had vibrant red hair not too too many years ago. All my siblings have red hair, too, and some of us have our own little red heads too. But red hair, pale freckled skin, propensity to sunburn after 10 minutes, even at midnight? Yup, that's me.

Ginger, as a flavor and ingedient, is definitely an acquired taste. I've come to embrace its warmth and spicy sharpness, especially in beverage form. The best kombuchas has ginger in them, for my palate.That being said, it's one of those things that can come to be "a bit much" fairly quickly and easily, so I knew that Trader Joe's 100% Ginger Drink Mix was going to be an interesting try.

The ingredient lsit here is pretty simple: it's just ginger. I'm unsure of the proper term, but it's a dried up, light, powdery mix inside the single serving packets. Really, the first thing that came to mind was a fine sawdust. There's no sugar or added anything to make big ol' granules of anything.

And you know what? The ginger powder doesn't smell like anything either. Not that I can tell, or nor can my lovely bride, who's olfacotry senses are much more keen than mine. This led to believe that somehow this might be a very mild mix - smell is such a large part of taste, after all.

Well, I was wrong.

Being that it's been a little chilly and dreary in the 'burgh, and I was heading back towards my chillier and drearier basement for work, i opted for the hot beverage option. The ginger drink mix dissolved nealry instantly will just a customary stir or two in the near-boiling recommended 12 ounces of water I poured into my mug.

First few sips were mild, warm, a bit spicy..and then it just got more and more and more, well super gingery. I had to cough once or twice in reaction. I mean, it was all pretty enjoyable...but I sure was glad to pour in a little more hot water to warm up my cup and dilute it down a little more.

Good flavor though, through and through. Served hot, the ginger drink probably could use a little twist of lemon just to make the flavor profile not as "one note" as straight up ginger. There's all sorts of potential here - could be served cold on a warmer day and still be pretty pleasant. I'm not sure if there's potential to use this in a DIY fermented beverage as a super easy way to add some ginger, but at the very least it could be an excellent mix in for other drinks. Sandy keeps mentioning how she wants to use this to mimic "that Starbucks drink" that I can only vaguely recall having one sip of nearly a month ago - something with pineapple and turmeric and ginger or something. Don't know, really, but sounds good.

Somehow I'm the only one who's tried it thus far here. Sandy's been more into tea for an afternoon warm beverage, which I'm not a huge fan of, but I'm sure we will get around to trying out the drink mix in a variety of ways. Got any good suggestions? Share away. I like it enough to give it a seven overall.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's 100% Ginger Drink Mix: 7 out of 10 Golden Spoons

Trader Joe's Almond Flour Chocolate Chip Cookie Baking Mix

"Let's see...something Eastery. Something...Good Friday-ish...? What do people eat on Easter? Rabbit. Oh, no wait. Ham. But we don't eat ham...

Um...how about candy? No Trader Joe's candy. D'oh! Something else that's sweet...ah, here in the back of the pantry drawer: Trader Joe's Almond Flour Chocolate Chip Cookie Baking Mix.

I'll make up some nonsense about people giving up wheat flour for Lent and this will totally work."

That was my train of thought in selecting this particular product for today's review. Maybe you did give up wheat flour or gluten for Lent and you tried this product recently. Maybe you gave up animal products and made it the vegan way. I don't know. I think we'll try it with cow's milk because we actually have some on hand right now.

I'm not the most culinarily-inclined guy on the block, so wish me well. I'll see you back here after the cookies are done baking.

---45 minutes later---

Okay, we're back. Mission accomplished. I'd call it a success in my book, with only a few minor mishaps. 

First step: mix the powder, butter, and vanilla in a bowl, then stir in milk one cup at a time. So far, so good.

I've always loved cookie dough, so during this process I seized the opportunity to lick some of the batter out of the mixing bowl. It was super almondy, but oh-so-good. The biggest difference between the batter and the finished product is that the cookies themselves tasted way less like almond. They were extremely similar to traditional wheat flour cookies. The nuttiness that I found so prevalent in the batter is just faintly noticeable after heating.

Technically, the baking process is only 10 minutes long. I left ours in the oven for about 5 extra minutes. They wanted to be very mushy at the short end of the baking spectrum and verging on too crispy at the long end, but they were very tasty in every case. 

Sonia said they reminded her of some fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies she used to get in middle school. These cookies she referred to were wheat-flour cookies, so there again, the taste of the almond flour is very similar to regular glutentastic flour.

There's a respectable amount of chocolate chips in the mix. They're not large. Just tiny morsels. The only sugar in the flour is "coconut sugar" and the chips have some cane sugar. None of that seemed to affect the flavor much. They just tasted like very good, normal, fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies, with just a hint of extra nuttiness and perhaps a whisper of "grittiness" for lack of a better word. 

$4.99 for enough mix to make 12 cookies. Gluten-free. They can be vegan, too, if you use alternative milk and oil instead of butter. 

This is set to be one of the weirdest Easters ever. Hope you're all staying sane.  

Four and a half stars from Sonia on Trader Joe's Almond Flour Chocolate Chip Cookie Baking Mix. Four from me.

Bottom line: 8.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Garlic Hummus Snack Pack with Pretzel Slims and Trader Joe's Organic Pitted Kalamata Olives

Obviously these aren't so normal times right now.

I think I've left my property once in the past five days. That means for over 90% of the time, I've been wearing pajama pants. Being cooped up in the basement to work at home has been interesting - always fun when you have to put a call on hold so you can holler at the kids to QUIET THE HECK DOWN - and my back actually misses the crappy, somehow compartively ergonomic office chairs. At the time I'm writing this I'm strangely excited by and apprehensive about going out later today for some groceries and beer.

And kids? Parents of young kids out there, you know what I'm talking about. Things aren't normal or all that fun at all...but we gotta do the best we can, despite all that, for the kids, right? Gotta take care of them, shield them, protect them, yada yada yada. I'm not talking about being a Pintrest-perfect parent - I'm talking about navigating them through these difficult waters to be relatively happy, reasonably healthy (physically and emotionally), and in tact without exhausting your last nerve. Thank God for Disney+.

I think I've written before that one of my family's favorite meals is what we call "snacky dinner" - basically what it sounds like. Cold cuts, cheese, pita, chips, hummus, veggies, fruit - everybody gets to eat what they want. It's a summertime favorite, usually washed down with a watermelon. It's great.

Well, it'd been a while, so we pulled out a snacky dinner the other night, and had two new-to-us contributors -  Trader Joe's Garlic Hummus Snack Pack with Pretzel Slims and Trader Joe's Organic Pitted Kalamata Olives.

I'll do the TJ's snack pack first. It's....nothing amazing, and not worthy of its own review in my opinion. I mean, do you know what small, crispy pretzel chip tastes like? Great. Now what about basic garlic hummus? Delicious, right? Now mentally dip the chip into the hummus and imagine what that tastes like - that's pretty much precisely what we got here. Darn good, right? Yup. Earth shattering and amazing and unique and...whatever else? Nah. I will give kudos that the snack cups seems to hold more than I thought, and I got fuller than I thought on mine. And even though I'm a generous dipper, I ran out of pretzel slims before I ran out of hummus. When times return for an easy, portable snack, this could be a go-to for sure. Delish.

And now a jar of olives? What do you want me to say? Usually for snacky dinners we'd hit up an olive bar and bring home a small sampling of olives and garlic and stuff like that. Not an option right now. So I've had kalamatas before, and this TJ jar full of them pretty much fits the bill. Nothing overly right or overly wrong, but kinda Goldilocksed at "just right." Strangely, our youngest, who previously has hated olives, gave one a try and wanted more. So maybe there's something to these particular olives, but if there is, I haven't determined what that is.

So, there ya go. Are either the garlic hummus snack pack or kalamata olive jars really all that special? Nah. But as a part of our snacky dinner, for a fun meal with the family, we enjoyed them immensely. Things don't have to be perfect or special or anything right now - they just have to get us through, and if they can bring a little happiness along the way, I'm all for it. There's goodness to be found in the mundane.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Garlic Hummus Snack Pack with Pretzel Slims and Trader Joe's Organic Pitted Kalamata Olives: 7 out of 10 Golden Spoons each

Trader Joe's Shrimp Tikka Masala

I don't know that I've ever had a tikka masala dish that I've disliked. Just from Trader Joe's alone, we've seen chicken, paneer, and vegan varieties, all of which were thumbs up. Shrimp is one of my favorite foods and always has been. As long as it's cooked properly, it's pretty hard to mess up shrimp, so the bar is set pretty high for this dish already. 

Like most of you, we haven't been eating out much lately. So I guess if anything, that lowers the bar a tad and makes us appreciate near-restaurant-quality microwave meals even more than usual. Hopefully we're giving this Shrimp Tikka Masala its fair shake. 

Anyway, Let's dive in.

I feel like they almost wanted to go with a flippable tray, a la those yogurts that come with mix-ins, but with the shrimp and sauce being flipped into the bed of cumin rice instead of cookie bits getting flipped into a bed of yogurt. The tray isn't quite that flexible, so you're left flicking the shrimps one by one into the other side. Fair enough.

There are about 8 or 10 small shrimp swimming around in a red sauce. For a frozen meal, their texture is about what you'd expect. Shrimp doesn't fare particularly well in the microwave, in my opinion, and these specimens were no better or worse than I expected—just a tad more chewy than steamed or fried shrimp would be. 

The sauce is a "mildly spicy tomato sauce" ...and that's what it tastes like. It's not particularly bursting with Indian spices or heat. It's a wee bit more complex and interesting than, say, tomato soup, but it struck me as being significantly less flavorful than any of the previous tikka masala dishes from Trader Joe's.

The rice here isn't the classic basmati rice we see in most of TJ's Indian food. This is "cumin rice." It's plain white rice...with some cumin seeds and coconut oil. So...pretty much just plain white rice.

I polished off the tray easily enough. Never gagged. Never grimaced at the flavor. But it didn't inspire any moments of bliss or euphoria, either. 

While I can't shaft it too badly, I'd put this near the bottom of the tikka masala pack and maybe even near the bottom of the list of Trader Joe's Indian food in general. That's not to say it's bad in any way. There's just a laundry list of other outstanding Indian foods at TJ's that I'll reach for before I pick up this particular selection again. Sonia sat this one out, citing an upset tummy as her reason for non-participation.

$3.49 for the single serving meal. Ready after 5-6 minutes in microwave.

Bottom line: 6.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Organic Milk Chocolate Caramel Eggs

Not gonna lie. I've been sitting here for a while trying to figure out how to make this interesting and/or unique...can't.

So here goes: Trader Joe's Organic Milk Chocolate Caramel Eggs.

What all is there to know? Not much. Our TJ's trips are somewhat limited and "sustenance/mission-at-hand" focused these days. Can't blame us. Maybe there's new and exciting stuff. If there is, please tip us off!

Easter's coming up soon. Can't exactly cancel Easter. Eggs are somehow probably one the two biggest secularly acceptable symbols of Easter, second maybe only to the Easter Bunny that supposedly hides the eggs. Never really understood all that, but after a while, you just accept it.

I'll tell ya where the TJ candy eggs can hide, though. Right in my belly.

You probably get the whole concept here already. Typical milk chocolate shell surrounding a small resevoir of oozy goozy silky caramel. That's precisely what we have here. There's nothing all that special or unique or outstanding about them. Nothing horrible either - everything is of good quality, as one would expect.

Tasty? Absolutely. Delicious? Positively. A little bit too easy to eat a few more little guys than ya should? Guilty as charged.

Amazing and earth shattering and sure to change your whole world? Nah, fam.

As a small note, I will say I didn't even realize they were organic. There's still part of me that expects organic stuff to taste weird or odd or a little different or, like, happier or something. There's none of that. It just tatstes like regular ol' milk chocolate and caramel. I'd say that's a positive.

Well, there ya go. Hope to hit ya with something more exciting next time. I liked 'em, my kids loved 'em. My poor, lovely bride somehow managed to not even try one before they all disappeared. it wasn't all me, love, I swear! Not like ya missed all that much anyways. At a couple bucks for a bagful, it's not a bad little seasonal pick up for the ol' Easter basket, but should not be a focal point...save that honor for the jelly beans. Think I'll just say the eggs aren't bad and rate them appropriately.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Organic Milk Chocolate Caramel Eggs: 6.5 out of 10 Golden Spoons

Trader Joe's Pappa al Pomodoro

Well, we know that in the last days a loaf of bread will cost a day's wage. When that day comes, it's time to go Mad Max on your neighbors to obtain some at any cost, because this stuff turns ordinary slices of white or wheat into scrumptious tangy tomatoey sourdoughy delights.

Just kidding about going Mad Max on your neighbors. We need to stick together now more than ever. But you should totally get down on your knees and beg them for a slice of bread if you don't have any, because it pairs really, really well with this stuff.

At first, I thought the box might contain a few pieces of bread or breadsticks, because look, right there adjacent to the soup...is a delicious-looking breadstick. But then I looked closer, and sure enough it says "serving suggestion" in the upper left-hand corner. But then I read the ingredients. Look! "Sourdough bread" is right there on the list right after "vegetable broth." I was overjoyed...until I opened the box several seconds later only to be crestfallen by the lack of sourdough breadsticks.

Maybe Italian folks already know this, but apparently pappa al pomodoro is a soup that's made with bread. I had no idea. What a weird concept.

But it's a darn good one.

After heating the product on the stovetop and pouring it into a bowl, Sonia and I sampled the soup by itself. It was very thick, tangy, tomatoey, and had just enough basil to balance the other flavors. I dipped a slice of semi-stale wheat bread into it.

Man, I don't know if I was just really hungry or what, but that was the best piece of bread I've eaten in a long time. The sourdough in the pappa al pomodoro seemed to magically transform my cheap, old bread into a scrumptious sourdough breadstick with an amazing Italian pasta sauce. We finished the bowl in short order, alternating bites of bread with spoonfuls of soup. Sonia was even more impressed than I was.

This fantastic pappa al pomodoro would work well as a pasta sauce, a pizza sauce, or as a stand-alone soup. $3.69 for two 9oz pouches. We like that it comes frozen and you can save it as long as you need to. We think this will be a repeat purchase. 

Perfect five from Sonia. I just wish it came with a couple little breadsticks. Four and a half from me.

Bottom line: 9.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Olive & Herbs Mixed Nuts

Well, working from home has been an adventure thus far.

For about the past week, I've been set up on a card table in the basement. It's a bit cool and drafty down there, but it works. I never knew I was raising a herd of elephants though - man, my kids are LOUD stomping around. My colleagues are still kinda catty, and the commute still kinda stinks (I mean, I walk right by the litter box), so not everything is completely different...

One thing that'll never change: need work snacks.

Vending machine or work cafe not an option for now, so instead I gave Trader Joe's Olive & Herbs Mixed Nuts a try.

I always gotta try new and interesting looking nut mixes, especially ones that aren't primarily peanuts. I have nothing really against peanuts, but nothing really for them...I mean, technically, they're not even a nut. There's just so many better nuts out there, especially cashews and pecans, and almonds aren't that bad, either.

Those aforementioned nuts are the basis of this entire snack. If asked for ratios, my bag seemed to be about half almonds at most, then a quarter each of cashews and pecans. That's above and beyond acceptable in my box. Each nut is roasted nicely,, enough to give them a satisfying crunch and bite, while displaying their respective nutty earthy flavors.

But that's not quite all.

Nah, you see, when I read the "Olive & Herbs" part of the title, I presumed without looking further that it meant just the flavoring sprinkled atop. Indeed, there's a lot of herbal medley plastered everywhere, and while I'm not knowledgeable enough to really point out which herb was strongest - there was some variance from bite to bite - I figured olive would be a flavor in the mix, too.

Nope.

Dried Kalamata olives, in the actual mix, along side the nuts.

Wasn't prepared for that.

Maybe I'm over-sheltered but I've never had dried olives before, I don't think. They're...a bit odd. Think dried out raisin, not chewy, more of a just a shell than anything. Olive mummies, maybe. Their oddness stands out more if consumed solo, but with a couple cashews, the bite is pretty seamless. In fact, I wasn't even aware I had some in a handful until I tasted them, because it's unmistakable. So potent. So strong and vibrant. So...dry. How is this even possible? I don't know.

Good thing my brilliant and lovely bride had the foresight to pick up not one but two bags - one for her, and one for me. At $4.99 for a 10 oz sack, it's not an awful deal by any stretch. Over the past two days I've eaten my entire ration, leaving me wondering what I'll find to graze on today. I'll have to go to work on that, I guess. For a unique-to-me snack at a good value, and all those cashews and tasty olives, I gotta go full five. Wouldn't change a thing. Sandy, who has way more self control than I do, shrugged and gave 'em a four based on her few small handfuls.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Olive & Herbs Mixed Nuts: 9 out of 10 Golden Spoons.

Trader Joe's Chile & Garlic Cashews

Cashews have never been cheap. I grew up in a home full of nuts. And I mean that as a double entendre. All three of us in the home were nuts, and likewise, we frequently consumed nuts. All manner of nuts: pecans, pistachios, almonds, macadamias, and of course, cashews were very often our go-to snacks. 

I can recall, sometime in the middle of college, or perhaps shortly after graduating, getting a craving for cashews rather out of the blue. I walked into a convenience store in downtown State College, PA and tracked down a little bag of cashews. I don't remember exactly how much they were, but it was enough that I immediately dismissed the cashew craving and opted for a fifty cent bag of peanuts instead. My parents weren't wealthy people. Not sure how we afforded things like macadamia nuts and cashews on the regular. No wonder my dad had trouble paying the mortgage throughout my childhood.

But regardless of financial status, you've gotta splurge once in a while. These particular cashews are a good choice in our opinions. Six bucks for the bag is a little steep, but they are oh-so-tasty.

On top of the classic flavor of salted cashews, the blend of chile powder, garlic powder, and onion powder makes them even more savory, flavorful, and full of a spicy kick. It tingles the tongue and warms the back of the throat and begs to be chased by a cold beverage. These cashews will definitely make you thirsty. Sonia and I both absolutely love their flavor. 

They're roasted to perfection, pleasantly crunchy, and not too salty. There's a decent amount of sodium and fat, but you'll find that with many nut mixes. It's mostly "good fat" or so I'm told. 

I'd complain about them being imported all the way from India, but apparently there are very few places in the United States with a warm enough climate for cashew farming, so "buy American" can't really apply here. That's probably the main reason for the hefty price tags.

Sonia's going to try adding these to a stir fry. I'm sure they'll blend in seamlessly. We'll report back if anybody's interested...

Four and a half stars from Sonia. Four from me.

Bottom line: 8.5 out of 10.