Trader Joe's 72% Cacao Dark Chocolate

I guess this review is kind of a cop-out, because everybody knows what chocolate tastes like. Everybody knows what dark chocolate tastes like, too. I would describe it as milk chocolate, but a little more bitter.

Now, we could get into wine critic-esque language involving "flinty undertones" and "hints of earthiness," but that would be pretentious. This is an "everyman's" kind of blog. Russ and I are indeed everymen. And I suppose, by association, that would make Sandy and Sonia everywomen. And along those lines, I do think this is a chocolate bar that everyone can enjoy, even those who've never had anything other than Hershey's.

I'm not a particularly huge fan of dark chocolate. I like white chocolate and milk chocolate because I have a sweet tooth. Indeed, I must have at least several sweet teeth. However, on occasion, I do enjoy the richness of dark chocolate, so long as I am not in the middle of one of my sugar-craving fits. Sugar is still the second ingredient in this chocolate bar, as you can tell from the photo on the right, but the sweetness doesn't overpower the cacao in dark chocolate—and this bar is no exception.

According to this Wikipedia article, a product must have at least 35% cocoa solids in order to qualify as dark chocolate. The 70 - 99% range is generally used for baking purposes. So, in the grand scheme of things, this chocolate is pretty darn dark. I was expecting it to be quite bitter, but both Sonia and I agree that it was surprisingly delicious and palatable. (Sonia usually does like dark chocolate, so it's not as big a surprise that she was a fan).

We're not often in the habit of just buying random chocolate bars, unless Russ and Sandy highly recommend something from TJ's, such as this little gem you might find at the checkout. But in this case, we received these at a lovely wedding we recently attended. Each bar was wrapped in a beautifully-designed candy wrapper created by the bride. We snagged a few as wedding favors and ate them in the days after the wedding. Thanks K & J!

Sonia will give this bar a 4. I'll give it a 3.5.

Bottom line: 7.5 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Dark Chocolate Covered Coconut Mango Bites

Finally, folks, here we go. This may not be a good thing to admit, but it's been a while since I've spotted something new at Trader Joe's that I was even remotely excited about. Instead, most of our purchases recently have been the same old usual thing....the same dinner-time staple....the same frozen lunches...the same this and the same that. While all these are legitimately good products, once you've had them a few times, well, they're not that exciting any more. It even got to the point where, for a lunch mix-up, I went ahead and bought myself some Chef-in-a-can recently. Desperate times, desperate measures.

But then, there's these, Trader Joe's Dark Chocolate Covered Coconut Mango Bites. More than cheap prices and a slew of healthy products, it's these kinda things that keep TJ's up and running. Take a combo that sounds just zany enough that it just might work, and put it in sight of someone like me who not only hasn't found a dark chocolate combo he hasn't liked, but has a healthy affinity for almost anything mango-related, and oh yeah, we're in business. Provided that they taste good, of course.

And yup, these choco-coconutted mango confections are pretty good. I'm sure, given the main ingredients, one can make the argument that they taste down right tropical. It's turning to fall in Pittsburgh and there's a legitimate chance we won't see the sun 'til late April, so I fully appreciate that. Really, I'd say these candy bites taste like a good Mounds bar, except a tinge or three sweeter in the filling. Inside each bite, if I had to guess, the orangey middle is probably composed of 70% coconut and 30% mango, and it's all kinda mixed up. If the mango elements were too strong or sweet, it'd throw everything off, but it's all kept in check by the dark chocolate coating. Each bite is about two nibbles big so there's plenty to chew on for some satisfaction, although I have a gut feeling these won't be lasting long around the house.

Sandy already had the bag ripped open when I came home from work. "These are gooood," she said. I could tell by her look and her tone there wasn't much more she'd need to say about them. After I had my first bite or two, yeah, that's a perfectly adequate way to describe 'em. Not perfect, but goooood indeed.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Dark Chocolate Covered Coconut Mango Bites: 8.5 out of 10 Golden Spoons
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Trader Joe's Wasabi Roasted Seaweed Snack

At times, I've gone out for sushi just because I had a craving for wasabi. And sushi was the only socially-acceptable thing I could think of to eat with it. I don't mess with those ginger leaves, I just put a nice little dollop of wasabi on each slice of my spicy tuna roll and go to town, using chopsticks, of course.

I realize I could buy wasabi, keep it in my fridge, and try it on everything from ham sandwiches to pizza, but somehow I think most of those experiments would fail. It might succeed on certain Asian-inspired dishes, but having it in my fridge would take some of the specialness away from it. Wasabi peas are fun, exotic snacks to munch on from time to time (I'm pretty sure the first time I saw them was at Trader Joe's) but the novelty wears off quickly and I tire of their taste after just one bag or so.

Enter Trader Joe's Wasabi Roasted Seaweed Snack. Many moons ago, we reviewed Trader Joe's Original Roasted Seaweed Snack. This stuff is basically the same thing—but wasabified. And they didn't skimp on the wasabi. These snack sheets of seaweed have a nice, sinus-clearing kick. Wrap up some rice for a delicious and unique (yet simple and cheap) meal. They're vegan and they're gluten-free. They're salty and they're spicy. With or without something wrapped up inside them, they make a wonderful break from the norm.

At 60 calories per package they won't wreck your diet, either. And I'm willing to bet wasabi raises your metabolism, too. Sonia isn't a huge fan of wasabi. It's a far cry from the Mexican chile-based spices she's used to. The plain seaweed snack got 4 stars from each of us. Sonia will knock this version half a star down, and I'll bump it half a star up. But it will still wind up with the same score:

Bottom line: 8 out of 10.