Trader Joe's Ube Pretzels

Earlier this week, I made one of my usual, occasional laments that here in Pittsburgh, we always seems last to get anything new, TJ's-wise. Weeks will go by and my lovely bride, who's always got her fingers on the pulse of new products in the pipeline, will be showing me the latest Instagram hype of whatever's new and hot. And we wait...and wait...and wait...and finally, when we get it, not that whatever it is usually isn't delicious, but it's kinda old news for the vast majority of yinz. 

Well, perhaps Big Joe finally heard all of that and tossed us a bone to gnaw on, with Trader Joe's Ube Pretzels. 

Neither Sandy nor I had heard of them or knew anything about them. It was a complete surprise. Somehow, we got ourselves a bag. I mean, I'm positive we're not like Neil Armstrong or anything, but for once, we kinda felt the rush of being first, or at least pretty darn close enough to it. 

If that isn't true, don't ruin it for us, please!

Anyways, TJ's ube pretzels. In case you didn't know, ube is basically a purplish sweet potato that naturally sweet, a touch savory, and translates well across many dishes, notably desserts and sweets. TJ's has been on a kick with them recent years, most notably with ube ice cream. Almost anything with ube, we like. 

As you can likely see, the basic premise here is very simple: a yogurty ube-flavored candy coating over some typical salty snappy pretzels. That's it. It's simple yet fun at the same time. We couldn't wait to start crushing some, and our kiddos were pretty excited about eating purple pretzels. Win win all around. 

Except...well...don't get me wrong, I like them. The few remaining survicors in the bag can attest to how many I snatched away from them. But there's something just a touch off on them. It seems to me that the candy coating is a touch or two more straight up sugar than actual ube flavored. Like Buddy the Elf ("Does it have sugar in it?...Then yes!"), I love straight up sugar, but it just doesn't work as great with the ube and then trying to work in a salty grainy pretzel. If something is ube, I want more ube. I can save the super sugary stuff for other times. 

Other than that, these pretzels are definitely a fun little snack that's worth the try. A bag runs about $3 and will definitely get a little sugar rush for that midafternoon lull. There's a good general thumbs up all around from us here in the 'burgh, what with us being first and all. Don't ruin that illusion!

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Ube Pretzels: 6.5 out of 10 Golden Spoons
 

Trader Joe's Ranch Seasoning Blend

Did you know that you don't need to shake a shaker? It's true. It's amazing what you can learn while surfing the interwebs. You just hold the shaker in place while upside down and rotate the plastic covering with the holes back and forth. Or hold the plastic covering in place and rotate the shaker itself. The salt or pepper or, in this case ranch powder, just falls right out...much more evenly than if you shake it, I might add. It was one of those "my whole life has been a lie" moments for me. So there you go. That's a free life hack just for reading this blog.

Another life hack: put this stuff on popcorn. Ranch popcorn. You're welcome. Why isn't ranch popcorn a thing? Well, actually, I suppose it is. But why isn't it more popular? I dunno. As I'm writing this paragraph, I'm realizing it says "sprinkle on popcorn" on the front of the label. I guess Trader Joe's beat me to it.

Pro tip: the more buttery your popcorn is, the better this seasoning will stick to it.

To be honest, ranch isn't really my thing. It's definitely not my go-to as far as salad dressing is concerned. I'm not big into hot wings or anything like that. In the upper midwest, they give out ranch with freaking everything. At some bar/grills around here, they give you ranch with French fries. I'm always like, "Um...have you ever heard of ketchup?"

But I digress. Ranch has its place. It's great as a veggie dip with carrots and celery and broccoli, although this powder doesn't really work in that application. I bet you could mix it with some sour cream and create a makeshift ranch dip. The side of the shaker actually has a recipe for "Creamy Buttermilk Ranch Dressing" involving mayo and buttermilk but I bet it would be just as good using only sour cream and this seasoning, a la those Hidden Valley seasoning packets.

It might just be me, but I felt this ranch flavor was particularly potent, almost spicy even. There's plenty of garlic, onion, dill, and pepper taste in addition to the creamy buttermilk. I'm thinking you could use this on baked potatoes, fish, poultry, or other meats. Anybody have any other crazy ideas? Love to hear about them in the comments.

We both liked it and would buy it again. $2.99 for the shaker. Four stars a piece from Sonia and me for Trader Joe's Ranch Seasoning Blend.

Bottom line: 8 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Buffalo Style Seasoned Almonds

 

It probably doesn't need to be said...but life can get pretty nuts sometimes. 

Theoretically I could on and on about the past few weeks, what, with our family's second round of COVID, a major house upgrade that made an emergency home repair needed, a two night hospital stay, a cross-state trip, all on top of kids and 60 hour work weeks and all sorts of stuff like school, dance class and lacrosse...but you're probably exhausted with your own stuff for me to load you down with all of mine. 

Know what helps us get through, and maybe spice it up? A good snack, with a little kick. Something like Trader Joe's Buffalo Style Seasoned Almonds. 

Man, I'd been looking forward to the TJ's buffalo almonds for weeks until they finally appeared on the shelves here in the 'burgh. We always seem to be last to get anything here, but once I could get my grubby hands on the half pound sack for only $3.99, I was all over them like the seasoning powder on these nuts. 

One word: spicy. Reallllll spicy. It's been a hot minute since anything kinda buffalo-ey got to me, but these almost do. The spice powder practically radiates red hot heat that's in and around every single bite. It's intense and strays close to too much. Maybe that's my inner old man emerging as I'm turning the last corner towards 40, but man, these nuts are muy picante. 

But lest you think that the piquant pungency is all that's present, there's more. Even before reading the ingredients, I noted a palpable creaminess in the powder seasoning. No, it's not really either ranch or blue cheese - it's more just a suggestion of milky goodness that puts the smallest of a damper on the flavor. Personally, I like it, as it's vaguely suggestive of dipping a buffalo wing in a little sauce to cool it down. Buuuuuuut, to be picky, I'd prefer a little bleu cheese flavor over plain cream. 

Combine all this with a traditional straight up toasty good almond, and boom. It's a fiery snacktime to keep ya going. 

Good stuff all around, and I'll intend on picking up more for whatever the crazy road up ahead holds. No complaints all around. 

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Buffalo Style Seasoned Almonds: 8.5 out of 10 Golden Spoons