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Friday, May 11, 2018

Trader Joe's Mint Watermelon Flavored Black Tea

Nothing says middle aged suburban peer pressure in the spring and summer than the distant drone of a lawnmower. If the neighbor's yard is mowed, yours has gotta be too. Once you hear one, you'll hear at least three more, guaranteed, in the next hour.

I literally have not had a chance to mow mine all spring long - too cold, too wet, too busy, too something - until this past Wednesday night. Yeah, it was so bad I had to attack it midweek, after work, before dinner. Kept losing the dog in the thicket. And of course, all my neighbors had already, so mine I was busting it out as quick as I could, pushing thru kneehigh grass, raking, sweating, feeling gross, had to get done before it got too late, with storms threatening to roll in so extra humid...ugh.

Fortunately, Sandy made a fresh batch of iced Trader Joe's Mint Watermelon Flavored Black Tea earlier that afternoon. Doesn't that sound like summer in a glass? And my longstanding "refreshment benchmark" is how cooling and pleasant a beverage is once I'm done mowing the lawn, so here was a perfect chance.

Ahhhhhhhhhh.

"Mint" and "watermelon" do not sound like natural flavor bedfellows to me. I hold both flavors in close to equal regard...but together? Potential chocolate gum theory application here. But nah, it works. Seems to me it's because both flavors are a very light, natural kinda of flavor, at least when unsweetened. The mint could have been bubblegummy, the watermelon could have been Kool Aid-y, but nope. Just light and crisp, with both flavors about equally present and wellbalanced, while backed by the usual steeped tinge of black tea.

This tea is some pretty good stuff. There's no sticky-sweet aftertaste, no artifical sugar crud, nothing along those lines at all. And yet I feel no need to guzzle it either. A good glassful is about all that's really needed.

Sandy and I didn't try it hot. We probably won't until temps are on the way down, not the way up. My instinct is that it wouldn't be as good as a steamy mug, but I've been wrong. You tell me if I'm wrong.

Count us as fans. Here's one tea worthy of a neighborhood-wide buzz.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Mint Watermelon Flavored Black Tea: 8.5 out of 10 Golden Spoons 

Wednesday, May 9, 2018

Trader Joe's Smoked Salmon Poke Bowl


It's been nearly two years since Pokemon Go launched, and now there's finally a Pokemon-themed seafood and salad bowl available at TJ's. Go Team Instinct! Wait. What? You say this has nothing to do with the wildly popular augmented reality game that 39-year-olds should totally not be ashamed that they play on the regular?

Apparently, poke (POH-keh) bowls are pronounced similar to the first part of "Pokemon," but actually pre-date the whole Japanese pocket monster craze by a few centuries. Also, they're native to Hawaii. I'll admit I have no previous poke bowl experience. I've heard the term and been vaguely aware of poke bowl joints here in the Philly area, but haven't made it into one yet. I do, however, enjoy salads as well as sushi, so...I should love this product, right? Let's dive in.

I'll save you my usual spiel about Trader Joe's and salmon and simply state that there's no way this product would have worked with nasty salmon. Fortunately, this smoked salmon sushi was awesome. I learned from Anthony Bourdain that sushi isn't necessarily supposed to taste "fresh," but that in most cases it has been frozen at some point, and should boast an umami flavor that fish straight from the sea will never have...or something like that. I'm no expert. But this salmon was delicious. It was smoky, flavorful, and fresh not overly funky. In fact, it was the best part of the bowl.
 
 
The pickled veggies worked well here, blending with the fish, dressing, and rice seamlessly. They added tang and zip, but did not overpower any of the other elements in the bowl. The dressing was nice, too. It was very thin, with a texture similar to traditional soy sauce—but it had a delicate ginger flavor with just a hint of citrus.

The worst part of the bowl? The rice, simply because there was too much of it. I like brown rice just fine, but it was the least interesting element in the bowl. Sonia thought the rice may have even been a bit undercooked. For $5.99, you'd think they could throw a bit more fish our way, along with more exotic veggies and dressing. But the bowl was filled with rice. Before I mixed the ingredients, there was a large "brick" of rice all wadded together at the bottom of the bowl. Just out of curiosity, I checked out a nearby poke place's menu to compare prices. Looks like you won't find anything under $9 there, and most products are more like $10-$13. Couldn't tell you if the serving sizes are comparable or not.
 
 
Another negative: the packaging is a little clunky and overdone. It's difficult to open up the lid without jerking the salad quickly, sending vegetables and fish flying across the table. Likewise, the dressing comes in its own cup covered with a plastic film and desperately wants to be spilled as it's unsealed. And there's yet another little baggie full of miniature seaweed strips, which, to be fair, was quite simple to open, but still seemed somewhat unnecessary. I guess we don't want soggy seaweed.

In summary, we were both pleasantly surprised with the overall flavor of the bowl, but we have a few reservations. I'm certain someone with more poke-experience (no, not Pokemon Go XP) will chime in and give us their opinion in the comments below. If poke bowls weren't a thing, and this were just some random unique salad that Trader Joe's offered, I think I'd throw out four stars for creativity and pleasant taste. Knowing this is a centuries-old tradition with hundreds of restaurants popping up all over the country and offering their take on the dish, I feel tragically underqualified to give an accurate score. But in the end, I'm gonna go with my gut. Four out of five stars from me. Three and a half from Sonia.

Bottom line: 7.5 out of 10.

Tuesday, May 8, 2018

Trader Joe's Seedy Almond Salad Topper

What's the best part of pizza?

That's easy. It's the little wedgie of cheese that gets stuck on the pan or box after slicing it. With a little luck, there's a good tidbit of topping left on it, too.

Likewise, the best bite of cake? For me at least, it's little scrapey parts, mostly frosting, left over. Clean that up right, that's what I always say.

Or the best chip chomp? When there's just a few little shards left, down in the bottom, which makes them perfect from sliding right from the bag into your mouth. Yum.

So...salad. What's the tastiest part of salad?

Also easy. Gotta be the goodies you put on top.

Nothing against spinach or lettuce or shredded carrots or grape tomatoes or pepper slices or any other veggie part of salad. That's some wholesome goodness. They're what makes a salad good. But what dermines if a salad is goood is the toppings and munchies, especially if you're not one for salad dressing (like me).

So does Trader Joe's Seedy Almond Salad Topper make a salad good or not?

Couldn't tell ya. I ate it on eggs instead.

 To be fair, that's one of the recommended uses printed right on the front of the bag, along with "vegetables" (presumed of the non-salad-esque variety) and cream cheese bagels. We were having eggs for dinner. Had to write a review. Gotta do what you gotta do. And as much as the bag also suggested it was a great idea, I didn't want to eat a little baggie of seeds all by itself.

And yup, baggie. Inside the main bag there's eight seperate single serving size sacks o' seeds. Each contain about the same amount of almond slivers, pepitas, sesame seeds (white and black), and nigella seeds with a slight little spicy kick from crushed red pepper.  As you could imagine, there's nuttiness and a little earthiness, a good bit of sesame, and even almost a little bit of a onion-y to not quite garlic-y essence to the mix, backed by some heat. In some ways, it kinda seemed like the everything but the bagel spice blend, minus the salt but plus the nuts and pepitas. The whole mix is appropriately crunchy and munchy, with a varying texture that did seem a little odd perhaps on eggs - almonds on eggs? seriously? - but I could tell it'd work well in a hearty salad, or on some roasted chicken or grilled veggies, or in several kinds of ways I haven't quite come up with yet but perhaps you have.

It's $3.99 for the big bag, eight servings in there, so basically 50 cents a pop for a small handful of stuff. It'd probably be more economical to make your own if this blend is one you particularly enjoyed, so there's a slight knock. As always, there's a premium for convenience.

Not much else to really say. So, for some, here's the best part of the review: the end.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Seedy Almond Salad Topper: 7 out of 10 Golden Spoons





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