Friday, July 14, 2017

Trader Joe's Puff Dogs

"I want you to review these just for all the Puff Daddy references you could make."

Love ya, sweetie, but Puff Daddy/ P. Diddy wasn't my jam back in the day. I'm familiar enough with the work of Mr Combs, but enough so that I could off a bunch of references in relation to Trader Joe's Puff Dogs? Nah.

I mean, "Puff Dog" does sound like a mid-to-late-'90s rapper. Probably was one, or could have been like a super dup between the aforementioned Diddy and Snoop Dogg.

As the story goes, the only reason we bought these was at the behest of one of the local TJ's employees, who knows who we are and what we do, and we were strongly advised to buy them. Why that is, I'm not sure, as I wasn't there. I personally wouldn't have. I have nothing against a quality hot dog wrapped up in a buttery biscuit type deal, but...it's easy enough to do on your own if the mood hits. Which for us is pretty rare...I don't think I've done this since college. Maybe even before. Aside from micro hors d'ouevres, of course. Those are tasty.

And yeah...that's what these puff dogs taste like. A fully grown hors d'oeuvres. There's nothing special, unique, or all that interesting about them, to be quite honest. I mean, yes, there's quality to be had here - the smoky beef hot dog in all its uncured goodness is rather tasty, admittedly - but, there's not much to be had otherwise. The puff pastry is standard, run of the mill flaky and a little buttery, and that combined with the beef dog do have a little greasy comfort food vibe that would taste even better after a few beers, I'm sure.

But there's nothing else, really. There's no "Trader Joe's-y" twist to them, like an unexpected seasoning or fancy cheese or some other novelty to them. It's tough to even argue a convenience factor, and at a somewhat premium price ($4.99 for five dogs - a buck per pup), you can get more bang for your buck by buying a pack of frankfurters and a tube of crescent rolls seperately and get much the same result.

Plus - this is probably silly - I hate the picture on the front. That yellow stuff hanging off the bitten-off hot dog? Is that supposed to be nacho cheese or day old scrambled egg? Yes, I know, probably mustard as evidenced by the cutesy mustard bottle up top, but still...there's something unsettling about it to me. Especially with the word "buttery" in close proximity. Yes, I'm weird.

Can't nobody hold me down. It might not be all about the Benjamins, but for the mo' money for these, I don't want mo' problems. Come with me or I'll be missing you...ugh, I can't do this any more. Probably not a repeat buy. They're okay, but what they'd best for is what P Diddy was best at: Sampling.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Puff Dogs: 6 out of 10 Golden Spoons

4 comments:

  1. Eating these as I read this, definitely wouldn't buy them again. "Meh" indeed!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Meh was my experience, but even more meh than your meh. As much I like Trader Joe's Turkey Corn Dog, is how much I didn't like these. They didn't puff overly much. The pastry wrapper wasn't interesting. The hot dog wasn't interesting. they were overpriced for the quantity and quality. If I were to get these again, it would only be if they seriously tweaked the wrapper and made it really puff, almost be crackly or something, to give it some interesting texture or something. But these, mega meh.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Gotta say that I disagree with you here. I love them. I'm sorry you gave them a bad review and hope others will try them because I don't want TJ's to eliminate them. I think of them as a better hot dog. 5 hot dogs for this price is a lot cheaper than you'd even get at Costco. I don't like regular hot dog buns, too much blah bread, but these are perfect for me. You can add whatever you want. If you want to dip them in a chili/cheese mix, go ahead. If you want to just eat them with mustard/ketchup - your choice. After I ate the first package, went back and bought 3 more. No more bad hotdog buns for me...as long as these are available.

    ReplyDelete